


After the Night When I Wake Up

by Plodder



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: A warning about a lot of kidnapping, Ahsoka Tano Saves the Day, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, But he still has one hand, Except Ahsoka, Fix-It of Sorts, Force Ghost Shenanigans, Grief/Mourning, Illnesses, It will all make sense eventually, Kidnapping, M/M, Medical Procedures, Not Suitless Vader, Obikin Big Bang 2018, Post-ROTS Fix-it, Redemption, Vader is still a little bit pretty at this point, everyone is broken, obikin, or tries to
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-06
Updated: 2018-07-27
Packaged: 2019-04-19 10:07:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 33,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14234955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Plodder/pseuds/Plodder
Summary: It hasn't even been a year since the Republic fell, but the new Galactic Empire already has made short work of spreading mayhem across the galaxy.  Ahsoka Tano has had enough.  She can't believe her old Master is wholly evil, and she can't believe there's nothing that can be done.  Ahsoka seeks out the one person who she thinks can help, but quickly realizes there's more than one way to fall and that this is going to be much harder than she originally thought





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The title is from the song 'If I Had a Heart' by Fever Ray (yes this is the Viking's theme song-what I was binge watching at the time I came up with this).
> 
> I'm excited to be part of my first Big Bang and a big thanks to the organizers! 
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is from the song 'If I Had a Heart' by Fever Ray (yes this is the Viking's theme song-what I was binge watching at the time I came up with this).
> 
> I'm excited to be part of my first Big Bang and a big thanks to the organizers! 
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

In a waterless sea of sand dunes, Obi-Wan Kenobi sat weather-worn and cross-legged in the shadow of a rock spire, cursing the twin suns’ heat.

Maybe this time, he’d meditate and he’d find some sort of clarity, but likely not. The only things he ever seemed to find out here were unpleasant, venomous creatures, heat stroke, and ghosts. Today, as the Force would will it, one of those unpleasant things found him. This time it was his old master, blue, dead, and disappointed, though that wasn’t an unusual state.

Obi-Wan maintained his lotus position, arranging his features into an expression of mock serenity, the particular one he’d used to annoy his own apprentice. “Go away.”

The unnaturally tall, translucent figure stood there like a statue, crossing his arms in front of him and making no move to answer or leave. Obi-Wan tried to appear unperturbed and kept his features bland, not wanting to provide any positive reinforcement. “Did you come here to make a nuisance of yourself? I don’t care to talk to you.”

This time, Master Qui-Gon deemed fit to answer him. “Everytime I see you, you’re further gone than the last time. You have to take care of yourself. You’ll die if continue on this road and quickly.”

“You don’t say that out of concern for my welfare,” Obi-Wan said as he opened his eyes, feeling full of acid and bitterness. Any pretense of serenity was gone.

He sat back against the rock and began rubbing at the gravel with his sandaled toe. “It’s always some ulterior motive with you. The grand design of the Living Force. Fuck off.”

“I do care about you. It’s not your time to die,” the ghost said, holding his ground.

“You sure were skilled at demonstrating your empathy towards me, especially when I was a padawan.” he said, gritting his teeth and tracing circles into the dust. “Anyway, this body won’t die. The Force won’t grant me the oblivion it granted everyone else. I felt them go. All of them, Qui-Gon,” he said, drawing a shuddering breath.

Qui-Gon squatted down in front of him and looked him straight in the eye. “Stop feeling sorry for yourself. It’s not becoming of a Jedi and it’s not like you.”

“I see. Again with the empathy, master. I’m not a Jedi, not anymore, and certainly not the one you trained so skillfully,” he said, snorting to himself. “The Jedi are gone and Obi-Wan Kenobi died on Mustafar.”

That was it. He was a forgotten hermit, nothing more. Sometimes he wished the dust would take him. This exile was the punishment he deserved for the mistakes he made, mistakes which contributed to the republic and his hopes burning up around him.

Qui-Gon hadn’t stopped looking at him pointedly. “Who will look after Anakin’s son?”

“He doesn’t need me. The galaxy is lost. The Order is gone, and Luke is well cared for by Owen and Beru.”

“Nothing lasts forever, not the Jedi, nor the Sith. But I’m surprised you would neglect Luke’s safety so you could wallow in misery and commit some kind of slow suicide. What if the Emperor finds him?”

Obi-Wan felt familiar tendrils of paralyzing guilt creep over him. He thought of Luke, and reached out with the force, finding Luke’s little presence safe and content. It took nearly all his remaining strength to do so. He spent the last of it burying the both of them deep within the Force, imagining them hidden at the bottom of an unfathomable ocean.

Desperately exhausted, he scrubbed at his face with his hands, looking away from the blue figure before him. It was just fucking like Qui-Gon to guilt him into doing something, play on his strong sense of righteousness. He kicked at the dust again, head swimming with heat and dehydration. The Force didn’t seem to be able to keep him going like it used to.

Qui-Gon knelt before him, looking concerned and kind, a look almost physically painful. He reached out his hand, and Obi-Wan could almost feel it’s warm, soft touch. For one moment, after being so alone, he yearned for it.

“Your focus becomes your reality, as I’ve said before. Focus on your health, on hope, on the boy and your outlook will change. The galaxy is vast and nothing is certain.”

Maybe he was right, but what did it matter? He was lost and broken. “Go away,” Obi-Wan said, staring at the sand.

Aching and conflicted, he looked back at his mentor, studied the familiar lines of his face. He had nothing else to say right now. The overwhelming despair that filled his sober, waking moments was weighing him down, grinding him into dust. He’d blow away in the wind soon, if it continued.

As he started to fade, Qui-Gon gave him the softest smile, his voice fond. It was these moments that made Obi-Wan love him as a padawan and forget his nonchalance and unintentional cruelty.

“If I’d thought that when you were a teenager that it would ever be this hard to get you to eat, I’d have thought I’d lost my mind. Please Obi-Wan. Please go back, rest, drink, eat.” The ghost said fading away, listening for once in his life, or death for that matter.

Obi-Wan got up, stretched and cracked his joints like an elderly cat, and trudged back to his hovel as the sun set. He almost willed an attack by the Tuskens upon himself to break up the monotony. Anything for a distraction.

As even calamity seemed disinterested in him, he made it to his hut without seeing or sensing another living thing. After arriving, he drank some murky water and rustled through the pantry, actually giving Qui-Gon’s suggestion a moment’s thought.

Its contents were meager and truly unenticing, some unlabeled preserves, stale flat bread and ancient bantha jerky. Unmoved by this fare, he spied the dark brown bottle of Tatooine moonshine on the little table. Every day he willed himself to stop this nonsense, but every day he relented and drank. Protecting Luke was his life’s new purpose, but that had been a bitter pill to swallow, and surely no one could fault him using a little help to get it down. Sometimes a person just needed a little oblivion when dealing with unending loss and suffering. Sometimes the ghosts had to be silenced, if only for a little while.

As the months had passed, it seemed to take more and more of the drink to blunt his awareness, but it at least it got him a few hours of peace once he passed out. He’d stopped using the Force to metabolize it and let himself suffer the after effects as well. The headache and nausea were some kind of odd penance and distraction.

Obi-Wan poured himself a generous mugful and sat on the sleeping couch, one of the few articles of furniture in this sorry place. It was gritty with dust and sand, and the ghost of his former self was appalled by the squalor. He would have also been appalled by the taste of this horrible swill, as he could have used it to strip the paint off his old Starfighter.

Eventual unconsciousness would come. It was a gamble though, because sometimes it meant empty nothingness and sometimes it meant dreams. The dreams were not always kind.

This time was good and bad. His subconscious travelled to the sunlit gardens of the Jedi temple, a place of nostalgic comfort and familiarity, the opposite of Tatooine. Lost in this idyll, he lay hidden in a copse of trees, away from any inquiring sorts. In a rare moment of drowsy peace, he dozed. A tall shadow blocked the warm sun, the shadow of someone he missed more than he could say.

“It doesn’t look like you’re meditating, old man.”

Obi-Wan reluctantly opened his eyes, feigning annoyance. “Mmmph, Anakin… Go away.”

“You don’t want that,” Anakin said, as he plopped down bonelessly beside him.

“Now you can read my mind? Know my every thought?” Obi-Wan sighed and closed his eyes again.

“I can. And I see that you’re dozing in the afternoon, just like an old man,” Anakin said, twirling a blade of grass between his fingers.

Obi-Wan made to get up, but Anakin smiled fondly and pushed him back down.

“I’m just making fun of you, Master. You obviously need the rest. What are you doing way out here anyway?” Anakin wiggled closer to lean against his hip.

“Hiding from the council.” Best to be truthful.

“What, the perfect Jedi? The youngest council member hiding?” Anakin said, butting up against him.

Obi-Wan decided not to honor that statement with a response. Anakin didn’t seem to mind, and moved to snuggle up beside him and put his hand on Obi-Wan’s chest. He smelled like home, vaguely of engine grease, the Temple standard soap, a faint hint of sweat, and leather. Obi-Wan could spend hours just breathing that in, and now, in his exile, would give anything to smell it again.

“Anakin, what are you doing?” Obi-Wan asked, only mildly exasperated.

“Resting with you, my soft, warm former master,” Anakin replied wiggling a little to find a more comfortable position.

“Soft, Anakin, really?” Obi-Wan said, affronted.

Anakin grinned and patted his belly, and Obi-Wan made a weak effort to push Anakin away, but ultimately gave in to his affection. It was the easier thing to do, and though neither admitted it, they both craved it.

“Anyway, I’m tired too,” Anakin said.

Now it was his turn to mock. “The chosen one? Tired?”

Anakin replied with a harrumphing noise and started to lay partially on top of him, like a heavy, lanky blanket. Obi-Wan let out a loud, theatrical sigh, but didn’t push him away. Most of the time is was better to let Anakin get what he wanted. They were quite hidden from prying eyes where they lay, and he couldn’t feel the presence of any other Jedi around them.

“Are you hungry? We should go to that noodle place that you like,” Anakin asked, voice muffled by the fact that his face was pressed against Obi-Wan’s chest.

“There’s another Council meeting tonight, Anakin.”

Anakin rolled off and sat up, eyes ablaze. “They don’t give you any time to rest, no wonder you’re out here hiding. I’ll bring some dinner to your quarters later tonight.”

With that decided, Anakin lay back down. They rested there together in contented fondness for a while. That memory dissolved in the smoggy sun of Coruscant and reformed into another.

Obi-Wan lay on a criminally uncomfortable cot in his quarters on the Negotiator after some unremembered battle, aching all over. He kept shifting his position, trying to find one that didn’t hurt. With every turn, he’d have relief for a few minutes but then the pain would return and the cycle would start anew. He must be getting old; he never seemed to recover as quickly as he used to.

He could sense Anakin coming down the corridor towards him, presence angry and blaring in the Force like the brash notes of some kind of horn. He couldn’t sleep anyway and he knew resistance would be useless and a waste of his non-existent energy, so he pressed the button to open the door.

Anakin strode in, eyes ablaze like the blue heart of a flame. He crossed his arms tightly across his chest. “Are you in here hiding?”

Obi-Wan rolled onto his back and frowned. “Hardly hiding. It’s late. I’m trying to rest.”

“You don’t look rested; you look like bantha chzzk.” Obi-Wan sighed. Anakin was always quite blunt.

“Did you go to medical? Cody told me you took a hard hit to that shoulder.” Damn Cody’s meddling ways.

Anakin started to do his best to pace about the small room. He was always up to a challenge and always on the move.

“It’s just bruised. There’s no need.” Obi-Wan’s head began to throb as Anakin continued to storm about. It was more than he could take.

“Will you be still for a minute?” Obi-Wan begged him, rubbing at his forehead.

“No, I won’t! Why do you always have to be this way?” Anakin was nearly yelling at this point.

“What way, Anakin? Please inform me of my failings.” Gods, he was too tired for this.

“Obtuse, self-sacrificing, karking frustrating.” Anakin sat down at the small desk, angrily tapping his leg.

“Nothing I say right now is going to help. You need to meditate on your feelings, Anakin. Find some way to purge this agitation.”

Anakin huffed. “You’re not my Master anymore. Don’t lecture me.”

Anakin walked over to the cot and sat on the edge. It dipped with his weight, just a little. “Do you think that I’m ever going to stop worrying about you?” Anakin asked.

“Anakin, do you think that I don’t worry about you? Taking risk is the nature of this war. I’m exhausted and I don’t want to have this argument. We’ve had it too many times,” Obi-Wan said, pinching the bridge of his nose.

Anakin’s face softened, though he was still humming with restless energy, a storm about to break.

“If you won’t go to medical, let me look.” Anakin said, more as a statement than a question. He got up and went to the tiny ‘fresher and removed some pain relief cream. “I bet you didn’t use this. You even have it in here and somehow you think you need to suffer.”

“I forgot that Kix dropped that off months ago, Anakin. It’s as simple as that,” Obi-Wan said, undoing his belt. There would be no stopping Anakin, there never was. It was always best to surrender.

Anakin helped him take off his outer tunics and frowned at the spectacular bruise on the back of his left shoulder and chest.

“Lay on your belly.”

Obi-Wan obeyed and tried to relax into the pleasure pain of it all. The strange contrast of Anakin’s gloved mechanical hand and his other warm, calloused, impossibly strong one was always strange but pleasant. Slowly, relief came. He felt boneless and drowsy, safe.

Anakin helped him roll back over and sit up, gazing at him with a strange intensity. Though he outwardly looked calmer, Obi-Wan could sense the restless energy simmering under his skin, his Force presence vast and overwhelming as the starry void. Obi-Wan could not imagine what it would be like to be him, to live with that.

Anakin reached up and cupped his face in his warm hand and snuck the other behind his head. “Sometimes I feel like I might explode and take the galaxy with me. I just can’t keep it all inside. You center me. I need you.”

Obi-Wan knew what he really meant, that Anakin couldn’t possibly imagine a life without him, didn’t feel he could go on without him. They’d gone over this before, in quiet moments after battles, hunched under a tent in the pouring rain. They’d argued about attachment, about death, about the Code. Their arguments were always circular and never seemed to reach conclusion.

This time, Obi-Wan knew he should pull away, but didn’t. “Anakin, I will always be here for you so long as I am alive and able. But you must be able to let me go.”

Anakin didn’t answer, just leaned in and kissed him hard, pulling him close, his mouth tasting of sweetened caf. Obi-Wan was startled, but not surprised. This undercurrent had been there; their relationship had been slowing changing, morphing from Master-Padawan, to brothers, friends, and now into something else entirely. Anakin’s attachment to him was deepening. Likely his was too.

Anakin released him and studied his face with softer blue eyes, flames dimming. “Don’t say anything. Don’t say it was wrong. For once, just don’t talk.”

Anakin ran his hand through Obi-Wan’s hair, gently caressing the back of his head.

“Anakin, why did you do that? Kiss me?” It was a stupid question, admittedly.

“Why do you think?” Anakin’s energy had dissipated, and his shoulders sagged in exhaustion and disappointment. He abruptly stood up and walked out the door. Obi-Wan lay awake for the rest of the night. He thought about rousing himself and finding Anakin, telling him what he thought, but he didn’t.

Obi-Wan had thought that they would have had forever, that the war would end and that he would have time to think for a while and make sense of it all. As it does, time had passed so quickly and somehow, they’d ended up on Mustafar. At some time, maybe that time, if he had listened close enough or said the right things, everything could have changed. He’d chosen being the ideal Jedi over loving Anakin, and it had failed them both.

Thoroughly pickled and in a stupor, the world faded to black. Time passed, of which he was blissfully unaware for a while. From his earlier efforts, he knew Luke was safe; he could sense no threats. Part of him was ashamed at the depth of this depravity, but the other part of him rebelled. He just couldn’t bear it any longer, and no one would know. No one would see him. They didn’t know what it was to be in this exile, with all their brothers and sisters and their only love, lost. They didn’t know what is was to feel all those deaths. They hadn’t failed the galaxy. In a few weeks, a month, maybe, he’d recover. He’d make something of this life, but just not yet.

Obi-Wan partially awoke to the odd sense of someone approaching the hovel, while somewhere in that state where it was impossible to tell dreams from reality. He knew it to be familiar presence, a dead girl, another ghost to haunt him. This was why he drank.

Straining his ears, he heard footsteps in the gravel outside, heard her enter. How was it that her ghost had grown taller, face elongated, markings matured? This was a strange torment.

“Master? Master Kenobi?”

He turned away from her and shut his eyes, hoping this fresh hell would pass quickly. Maybe if he pulled his robe over his head it would go away. She wasn’t real.

“Master Kenobi? Are you all right? Are you ill?”

He could hear her walking closer, the sound of her boots crunching on the gritty floor, the faint rustling of the synth-leather of her clothes. Was the force so cruel that his ghosts would seem so tangible? The quiet sound of her breathing seemed to echo in the room.

He screwed his eyes shut, willing her to be gone. She wasn’t there, just an elaborate hoax brought on by delirium. This had happened before, when there’d been something off about the moonshine, leaving him ill and disoriented.

Obi-Wan’s heart raced and he felt sick. He drew his old robe closer and pulled it tight around him, hiding like he had for so many months. She was dead, like the rest. Her voice was so sweet, tentative. This was the last time. He’d never drink this swill again; this was unbearable.

“Please talk to me? I… I, we need your help.”

He tried to speak, but his mouth was so dry. It came out like gravel. “Go away. You’re not real!” He shouted with as much vehemence as his parched throat would allow.

Her footsteps paused for a moment. “Only you can do this. We need you; It has to end. Please, help us.”

She walked over and touched his shoulder. Her hand felt warm. Qui-Gon had never been warm, or solid for that matter. This needed to stop.

He sat up and pushed her away, willing oblivion to return. “Go away!” He said, drawing his knees to his chest and backing up against the wall. This was more terrifying than any spector.

She looked so lost and hurt, mouth gaping open, eyes huge and blue as a cloudless sky. He closed his own eyes tight again. “Leave here. Go. I won’t say it again.” Not that it seemed to do any good to berate ghosts. They had a will of their own.

Oddly, this one obeyed. He heard the footsteps move back towards the door. The sound of her ragged breathing echoed in his mind. Tears sprung to his eyes, a useless waste of water, and he rubbed at them with the back of his hand. Aching and forlorn, Obi-Wan fumbled around on the floor beside the bed. Where was that bottle again?

* * *

Ahsoka nearly ran out of the hut and stood outside, bent over, lungs heaving. What had she expected? Not that. She’d gone over this meeting in her head a thousand times. She’d imagined that he’d be sad, and she’d have to sit with him and convince him for a while, but then it be like one of their old Clone War adventures, when she and Anakin… well she would convince one of her Masters to do something ridiculous. They’d say no initially, but then would give in and eventually laugh about it, going along with mock reluctance.

Ahsoka felt nauseated by what she saw. He’d been nearly unrecognizable. She’d seen Master Kenobi injured or ill a few times, maybe dishevelled or beat up after a battle, but this was unthinkable. His Force presence was so dim that she’d almost thought that he wasn’t home. And physically…

His hair and beard were longer than they’d ever been, dusty and matted. Face sunken and hollow, she could see the starkness of his clavicles through his loose robes, the prominent bumps of his sternum. His dark shadowed eyes had been glassy and clouded until he turned away from her, pupils huge in the dark room. A brown glass bottle was near the sleeping couch. She’d never known him to drink, but then again, he’d been a private man.

As she headed back to Mos Eisley, she began to feel off, her chest tightening like she couldn’t get enough air. Overwhelmed, Ahsoka stopped the speeder for a moment and let out a frustrated scream into the stillness of the empty desert. She took a deep breath and felt marginally better, watching the vista of the twin suns starting to set.

What right did he have to wallow in his own misery when the galaxy was suffering? What right? Kark what he wanted. Obi-Wan needed saving. Not for her sake or his, but for the galaxy’s. Ahsoka had come up with a plan to overthrow the Emperor that just might work, but this plan needed Obi-Wan’s help to succeed. There was something only he could do. His task wouldn’t require fighting, or bravado, or strength in the Force, but something far more subtle.

One way or another, she needed to go back and get him. The direct approach had failed, but she’d never been conventional or someone who gave up easily. Even as weak as he looked, she wasn’t sure that she’d be able to subdue him without help of some sort. Once she arrived at Mos Eisley, she sat down at a café, ordered some murky, tepid water, and started to plan. She’d need to go back to the grotty little room that she’d paid for and make a few calls first.

Sitting on the hard cot in the dusty little space, she picked up her holovid receptor and called Bail Organa. His small, blue form appeared.

“Well, that was terrible,” Ahoska said, dryly. No point in sugar coating it. She was still in frank shock from her little visit.

“He’s not with you, I take it.”

“No. He… he’s a mess. I almost didn’t believe it was him.”

“I told you this wouldn’t go well, Ahsoka.” His tiny form frowned and looked as introspective as a hologram could.

“Ahsoka, you didn’t see him that day but I did. I’ve never seen anyone so lost before. His face was just blank. No grief, no tears, just nothing but shock. I don’t know, Ahsoka. Something in him broke that day. Something in him died.”

Ahsoka wouldn’t give up. It was unthinkable. “He’s in there. He’s strong and stubborn.”

“I know you think that this is our only choice, but we can go against the Empire in other ways... They may just take longer.”

Everyday beings were suffering more across the galaxy. They couldn’t wait. “I’m going to bring him back. I’ll just have to use the backup plan.”

Bail sighed audibly. “If you think it’s best.”

“You know how I feel. Anakin hasn’t been with the Sith for that long. Not even a year. He’s the only chance we have to defeat Palpatine. Obi-Wan’s the one who can get Anakin back.”

“So you keep telling me. I was his friend too and want to see him, Ahsoka, but it may be a fool’s hope.”

“I’m fine with playing the fool. What do we have to lose? Rex’ll go get Luke. Ok?” Ahsoka was nearly bouncing with nervous energy but tried to keep it out of her voice.

The hologram looked resigned. “Yes. Let me know when you have them. Be safe.”

She called Rex next. “Rexie, you need to get down here and land at the coordinates I provide you. Go get Luke like we talked about and bring him back to the ship. I’ll meet you there. The shuttle will be parked there.”

“Ok Tano, but what’ll I do with the kid?”

“I don’t know, bounce him around or sing or something. Look it up on the holonet. Make sure you get his toys and food and stuff from his aunt. Bail will talk to them if they won’t give him up.”

Rex’s tiny face looked perplexed. “I’m not sure I like this mission. I’ve never held an infant; hell, I’ve never even seen an infant up close.”

“He’s 10 months old, not a tiny baby, just ask his aunt… you’ll be fine,” she glanced at the hologram, who looked decidedly uncertain.

“While I’m on baby duty, what are you going to do?”

“Retrieve Master Obi-Wan, but with the other plan, the one we talked about but hoped we wouldn’t need to use.”

“Ahh. Good luck, sir!” She didn’t correct him. It was hard enough to get him to just call her by her surname.

She sent him the coordinates. “I’ll meet you there, tomorrow afternoon after I get him. Not going back into the desert in the dark; there’s some weird chizzk out there. Be ready to leave when I get there.”

“Yes sir, I mean, Tano.”

“Ok sir Rex. See you soon. Tano out.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is obviously a work in progress; I will update as my schedule allows :D
> 
> Huge thanks to my dear friend and beta picavenger14- this couldn't have happened without her help and cheerleading!
> 
> Thank you so much for reading! If you'd like, let me know what you think! I always appreciate it c:
> 
> I'm darthplodder on tumblr if you'd like to say hi.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Obi-Wan may seem somewhat OOC, but this I imagine his first year after the fall of the Order and Anakin as being very difficult.

Ahsoka didn’t wait long before leaving the room to go out into the coming night. As dusk fell, she weaved through throngs of beings in Mos Eisley’s night market. She dressed in drab clothes, hood covering her montrails. The heat was less oppressive, so more beings were out, vendors hawking their wares, scuffles breaking out, mothers shouting to their children. The air smelt of spiced food, strange herbs, and the unwashed. Some kind of discordant but exotic music played in the distance. The odd and the ordinary were on display and all manner of things could be bought for a price. She needed something specific.

A few hours later, she walked away with her prize; a drug strong enough to sedate a bantha, but that wouldn’t kill a sickly man. The old Twi’lek that had sold it to her had asked, “You’ll have to use a hypospray. Can you do that? You have to get close.”

“I can get close,” she had replied. This would be the hard part, but she’d think of something. He was not well and she was young and hydrated. With the element of surprise, she guessed she could take him down. She’d find out soon enough.

The following morning, she took the rented speeder out to the Judland Wastes and parked it out of view of the hut. She’d been practicing at dimming her Force presence and hoped it worked. Trying to be quiet as can be, she crept towards the hovel and hid behind one of the vaporators. She couldn’t see or hear any movement, but could feel he was nearby.

Going up closer to the vaporator, she managed to cleanly break off a loose part and figured that he’d eventually come out to check it. Ahsoka hoped it wouldn’t be days, or she’d have to think of something else. For an uncomfortable eternity, she crouched behind a convenient pile of rocks, watching and waiting, trying not to fidget.

Eventually he emerged, a little wobbly and hunched over in his weather-beaten robe. Ahsoka took off at a sprint, in order to execute a Force-enhanced running tackle. He wasn’t prepared for it and she struck hard, sending them both to the ground with a little more oomph than she had meant. They skidded for a few meters before coming to a dead stop. He hadn’t really tensed for the impact and his head struck the gravelly dirt with more force than she intended.

The impact had momentarily stunned him and it gave her a second to get out the hypospray. Just as he started to stir underneath her, she plunged it into his neck, and he went limp. She couldn’t believe that this fragile creature underneath her was her Grandmaster. He had always seemed larger than life, infallible, the perfect Jedi. It was hard to reconcile his current state with the man who had patiently helped her with her Jar’Kai, who had meditated with her. She scrubbed a hand against her watering eyes. There was no time for this.

Shaking a little, with her heart thumping her chest, she flipped him onto his back. His eyes were closed, face oddly peaceful, and he was bleeding from an abrasion on his forehead. A purple lump was forming under it. Kriff humans and their fragile skin, she huffed. Ahsoka brushed the dirt off his face and sighed, hoping she hadn’t done any permanent damage.

She grabbed him under the armpits and dragged him into the speeder, arranging him as best she could in the passenger seat. About to hop in the driver’s seat, something stopped her. The Force called to her, telling her to go back into the hut for a minute.

She scurried inside, looking for anything she should take with, something the Force would find significant. Next to the bed was a large chest, and something inside it called to her, begged her to lift the lid. She opened it and found two lightsabers that she knew well.

Obi-Wan’s she recognized and pocketed, but the other made her pause. A sheath of metal, simple in its design, strong and elegant as the hand that held it. She gasped, crouching beside the chest, and nearly fell back on her heels. Master, she thought, I miss you so much. Studying the weapon reverently for a minute, she clipped it to her vest and walked back out to the speeder.

A few hundred meters away, Rex was waiting inside their small, battered freighter. He must have heard the sound of the speeder approaching and came briskly down the gangway, wearing civilian clothes with a hood.

Ahsoka hopped out, noting that Obi-Wan was still slumped in the seat, deeply unconscious. She could barely sense his Force presence. For the second time, she hoped she didn’t damage him.

“Do you have him?” Ahsoka asked.

“Yes, he’s inside, sleeping. Sweet little tyke. Senator Organa helped, um, to persuade his aunt and uncle to give him up.” He walked over to the speeder as Ahsoka got ready to heft out her own burden. “Wait, sir, I’ll get him.”

Rex gave Obi-Wan a worried look. He did look a bit ridiculous slouched in the seat, head lolling back, mouth open, laceration bleeding down the side of his face. “That can’t be him. Are you sure?” Rex gaped, his usual calm composure gone.

“I’m sure.”

Rex frowned and poked Obi-Wan reluctantly in the shoulder, then shook him gently, then not so gently. Ahsoka impatiently tapped her foot against the sand, desperate to leave this horrible planet behind them. “Rex, he’s out. Pick him up and let’s leave before something terrible happens.”

“I can’t believe we’re doing this, Tano. This doesn’t feel right,” Rex said as he scooped up Obi-Wan into a bridal carry and started hauling him towards the freighter. She knew Rex had a huge amount of respect for Master Obi-Wan, and she could feel the sadness and confusion rolling off of him. This couldn’t be easy to take.

“We made this plan and we’re not going back on it now.” Ahsoka said, with more conviction that she felt, and followed Rex, closing the gangway behind them as they entered the ship’s hold.

“He’s not going to like this, Tano,” Rex said, brows downturned.

“He’ll just have to get over it”

The freighter did have an ancient medical droid and a fold out cot in the ‘medbay’, which was really a glorified closet. Ahsoka pulled the cot down from the wall and they lay Obi-Wan down. He seemed to flop there, bonelessly, limbs hanging off the bed until she arranged them in some kind of order.

Ahsoka activated the droid, an antiquated version of a 2-1B medical droid, and it slowly came to life. Frowning at the rusted thing, she doubted it had very advanced programing, nor did they have much in the way of supplies. A wave of grief washed over her, and for the thousandth time, she wished her Master was here. He could fix anything.

“We’re going to need refuel and stock up. He’ll probably need a med center too,” Ahsoka said.

Rex rubbed at his chin thoughtfully. “Yeah. We’ll need to stay in the Outer Rim for now.”

Ahsoka nodded in agreement and peered at their too still guest’. “He’s got to stay out until we’ve landed. I don’t want him waking up on the ship and freaking out. He’d probably take the whole thing down.”

“Should we cuff him?”

“Yup. R2 will watch him too after he sets our coordinates. Let us know if he’s waking up,” Ahsoka said, looking at the droid who burbled back an affirmative.

Ahsoka walked over to the nav computer, R2 following close behind, and thought for a moment. “Polis Massa. That’s where we’ll head. We can hide out there for a while.”

Credits weren’t really a problem, but the Empire was. Bail had given her what she needed in a variety of currencies, to show his reluctant support of this harebrained scheme. They’d filled the hold with a variety of cargo, carpets, antiques, various other objects to take on the role of traders. Ahsoka had created an elaborate ship’s log with various routes, receipts and transactions, and cargo descriptions in case they were searched.

They lifted off, clearing Tatooine’s gravity well. Coordinates entered, they took off into hyperspace, headed for the Outer Rim asteroid. Rex and Ahsoka sat in the cockpit in silence not knowing exactly what to say to each other. She couldn’t believe that the plan was actually working so far.

Leaning back in the seat, Ahsoka came to a horrible conclusion. She’d completely forgotten about the other new passenger.

“Luke!? Rex, where is he? We can’t just leave him alone!” She leapt out of the seat and looked around.

“The little tyke was sleeping in crew quarters in his carrier. We’d hear him if he cried.”

“I know but…” Ahsoka rocketed towards their quarters. The carrier was empty.

“Rex! Where could he have gone? Can he even walk?” Had she really just a second ago thought things were going well?

“I don’t think so… just crawl”

There wasn’t really that many places he could go. Rex went off to search the hold and Ahsoka went the other way. She reached out with the force and felt his small, bright presence, part of it uniquely his own and part an echo of someone she had known and loved. Trying to wrap her head around that, she realized Luke had found a friend.

Ahsoka approached the cot in the ‘medbay’. Obi-Wan remained deeply unconscious, but curled up beside him was a tiny blond human. Upon seeing Ahsoka, he sat up and said “Bah!” with a grin, cheeks pink and round.

He was one step from bald, hair baby-fine fluff. She wondered if this was normal for humans. Obviously unfazed by strangers, he reached up his arms at her, in the universal language of younglings for ‘up’.

She obliged and held him on her hip. Surprisingly warm and heavy, he sat there patiently, looking around the room. The med droid had noticed her and turned its head, whirring toward her.

“This adult male human’s physiology is out of balance. He requires more advanced medical care than I can provide. It is recommended that you seek further assistance. I have administered fluids and an antitoxin. Please seek further assistance.” It turned back around, continuing to study its patient.

Obi-Wan looked an unfortunate shade of grey, his breathing shallow and fast. Hold on you stubborn old gundark, she thought to herself. Luke made a whimpering noise and pointed at Obi-Wan laying on the bed.

“Yes, Luke, that’s Obi-Wan. Your dad’s, um, friend. He’s sick, but he’ll be ok.” She bounced him on her hip a little.

“Bi” Luke said, solemnly, pointing at his new friend.

“Yes, ‘Bi. He’ll get better.” R2 made a sad, low sound from the corner of the room.

“Don’t you start, Artooie” Ahsoka said, addressing the droid. “You two never really liked each other.”

R2 made a noncommittal sound. Ahsoka rolled her eyes and started to walk away, but Luke crowed out an emphatic “Bi!” and reached toward the bed.

“Bi needs to rest and you need some dinner. He’s not going anywhere.” Ahsoka guessed that something about his Force presence was attracting Luke, safe and familiar.

Back in the crew’s quarters, Rex met back up with them. “Ah, you found the little beast. Where was he?”

“Curled up with Obi-Wan. He likes him,” Ahsoka said, ruffling the down on his little head.

“Bi!” Luke said, when he heard his favorite name, clapping pudgy hands together.

“I see that,” said Rex, raising a brow.

The two of them muddled through feeding and changing Luke, who looked on at them with cheery calm, as if he was secretly amused by it all. He played with and chewed on some blocks for a while, then fell asleep. They put him in his carrier and took him out to the cockpit.

Rex looked pointedly at Ahsoka, “Permission to speak freely?”

Ahsoka tried not to roll her eyes. “Rex, we’re past that, aren’t we? Just say what you want to say.”

“It’s just that, I don’t know about this plan. There’s other ways to go about a Rebellion, and… that doesn’t look or seem like General Kenobi, more like the village drunk. I’m sorry to say it. I respect and admire him, or at least I did. It’s so hard to see him like this.”

Ahsoka sighed. “He lost everything, Rex.”

“So did you, sir” Rex said, looking down at his hands.

“I left the Order willingly, and I, I had my doubts before that. I didn’t feel it’s death as much as he did. I didn’t have my apprentice who I’d raised and loved turn on me and on the Order that was my home and family.”

Rex set his mouth in a firm line. “General Kenobi would have done whatever he needed to do to make things right.”

“This Obi-Wan will too. He fell as much as my Master fell, just in a different way. He needs to find his purpose again.”

“You think this will really work? That Obi-Wan will convince Skywalker to leave the Emperor?”

“I do. They loved each other so much. Neither of them realized how strongly the other felt. If they had, maybe this wouldn’t have happened. Anakin needs to see that; he needs to know that. He needs to know that the Emperor is just using him,” Ahsoka said, reaching over to clasp Rex’s shoulder.

“The shinies could tell that those two loved each other. Hell, a partially sentient slime mold could have seen it. But Ahsoka, what if that love is gone? We know something terrible happened between them.”

“I don’t know exactly what happened on Mustafar, but I can’t believe that it’s gone entirely, it’ll just have to be… um… rekindled. Anyway, what do you know about village drunks?” She smiled at him, trying to lighten the mood.

“Hey! I’ve seen a few. I’m still not convinced. And you can’t take this all on yourself.”

“I have you, don’t I? And Bail. As long as I’m alive, Rex, I’m going to do everything I can to fix this. I can’t just hide and let the galaxy suffer. I just can’t.” She got up and started to pace the room, staring out the view port.

Ahsoka sat back down, hands on her thighs. “Plus, some of it is my fault.”

“How is any of this your fault? Rex said, raising a brow.

“I left the order. I left him, Rex. He must have felt so alone.”

“Maybe you could have handled it differently, but murdering the Jedi, especially children, is not a normal response to feeling alone.”

Ahsoka let out the breath she’d been holding and sighed. “No, it’s not.”

“None of this is your fault, but I’ll help you any way I can. Nowhere else to go, anyway,” Rex said with a sheepish grin.

“That’s not true. You could go to the Outer Rim or Wild Space and start a life somewhere.”

“Ah, Tano, we’ve talked about this. I’m not going to spend my life in hiding. The Empire’d find me anyway, eventually. Rather face them head on then run.”

“Me too, Rex. We’ll make this work,” Ahsoka said, sitting back down.

Rex smiled again, more softly this time. “Well, if anyone could make a plan like this work, you might.”

“Might?”

“Still not convinced, but I’ll do everything I can to help you.”

“All right Rex, I’ll take it.” With that, they leaned back and rested for a while in their seats, both exhausted.

* * *

Bound in both body and mind, Obi-Wan wandered through a dense forest of memories and thoughts, most of them meaningless images flashing briefly in the black of his mind. As he walked down this dark way of dreams, he followed a few of the images along dim, wooded paths, overgrown with thorns.

One memory stood out more than most and he let it pull him in, embraced it fully. That horrible mission was finally the over, the one, looking back on it, which may have driven the final wedge between him and Anakin. Exhausted and burnt out, he’d finally gotten back to his quarters after this mission that he’d rather forget. Why had he ever agreed to fake his own death?

Sure, the Chancellor had not been harmed, but Dooku got away, and Anakin was never going to forgive him. Anakin had been slipping further and further away from him, out of his tenuous grasp. Obi-Wan was afraid that this was the last straw. He had the sinking feeling that the rift between them was insurmountable.

Obi-Wan rubbed at his eyes until he saw stars and sank down against the wall of the corridor leading to the main room. At least he wore his own face again. The feeling of insidious disgust was strengthening within him, burning like bile in the back of his throat.

Sitting on the hard floor with head in hands, he could feel a thunderous presence in the Force coming closer towards him, like an approaching storm. Anakin. Honestly, he was surprised that he would even speak to him. He’d take anger over silence anytime. At least it was something.

Part of him felt angry and self-righteous. He’d done the right thing, followed the Council’s instruction, played his role successfully, and Anakin should get over it. The other part knew that he’d made a huge mistake.

Anakin had burst into the hall, door closing behind him. The Force crackled around him like electricity, his eyes alight with self-righteous anger. Anakin was burning with it, causing the hairs on Obi-Wan’s arms to raise like an approaching lightning strike.

“You have some explaining to do. How could you?” Anakin’s voice was low and shaky.

He strode over to where Obi-Wan was sitting and grabbed him under the armpits, yanking him to standing. Obi-Wan didn’t resist. He didn’t resist when Anakin pushed him against the wall hard enough to bruise.

“I held your dead body. I mourned you. I lit your fucking pyre!” Anakin yelled, frothing with anger tinged with something else.

Obi-Wan didn’t resist as Anakin shook him, pushing him again back against the wall. His head struck hard and the room swam, exhaustion, lack of nourishment, and despair getting the better of him.

“Oh fuck.” Anakin said as his face softened. He cupped the back of Obi-Wan’s head and pulled Obi-Wan towards him holding him so tightly.

“Fuck, I thought you were dead. Fuck. I couldn’t… I just couldn’t,” Anakin said as he continued to hold Obi-Wan, his whole body shaking.

Anakin studied him intently, as if he were looking at Obi-Wan for the first time. He moved his hands to the sides of Obi-Wan’s face and traced the line of his cheekbone and jaw with a gloved finger. “I’m glad I don’t have to see that ugly bastards karking face anymore.”

His expression softened, and he rubbed his finger ever so softly against Obi-Wan’s lower lip. “You look weird without your beard. Younger.” Without further thought or commentary, he pulled Obi-Wan into a desperate, fierce kiss.

Obi-Wan was too tired to fight him, and he needed to stop lying to himself. He wanted this. Anakin’s lips were chapped but soft, his tongue curious. They came apart gasping for air.

“Don’t think I’m not still mad,” Anakin said, gasping, voice breathy. He pushed Obi-Wan across the room, so his back was up against the sofa.

They lost their footing and fell to the floor onto the rug. Anakin, more gently this time, pushed Obi-Wan down and straddled him, pinning his shoulders to the floor with his hands. Obi-Wan could have thrown Anakin off, but he didn’t. He had no more energy to devote to his usually precise control. Everything in this moment would be left to fate and the Force.

“I hate you,” Anakin said, with eyes like meteors crashing through the atmosphere.

“Do you?” Obi-Wan replied, knowing that he really meant the opposite. If Obi-Wan had been honest with himself, he would have admitted that he felt the same.

“No. Not really. I can’t. But I should,” Anakin said, thunderous expression fading into sadness and kissed him again, more softly this time, the kiss given to a dearest beloved.

Obi-Wan wiggled a little underneath Anakin and gently pushed him away. “Do you really want this?”

Anakin relaxed his grip. “I want this. I’ve wanted it since I was 16 and walked in on you in the shower with Quinlan Vos.”

Obi-Wan couldn’t help but laugh at that memory. “I’m sixteen years older than you.”

“Kriff, I didn’t care. I still don’t care. You’re not my Master any more. But I still need you.” He started to pull at Obi-Wan’s outer robes, trying to push them off his shoulders while kissing his neck.

Obi-Wan gripped his arms. “Anakin, if you’re going to fuck me, we’re not doing it on the floor. I’m too sore for that.”

“All right, in respect for your advanced age,” Anakin said smiling.

He stood up and pulled Obi-Wan to stand beside him. They walked to the bedroom in silent anticipation, tension building around them like a thunderhead about to break.

Obi-Wan didn’t know if Anakin had ever had a male lover before, and he struck Obi-Wan as the monogamous sort. Obi-Wan knew that he and Padme were lovers, but he didn’t dwell on that thought right now. He himself was by no means celibate. He had friends he turned to when the need struck, and he was there for them. It was a mutually beneficial agreement and without attachment. Mostly. The lights to set to dim, his tidy bedroom was only marred by a stray cloak lying across the bed.

“I’m still angry,” Anakin stated as he finished pushing Obi-Wan’s outer robes off his shoulders and then tried to pull his under tunic over his head. After fumbling with it, he became frustrated and just tore the thin fabric.

“That’s perfectly clear.” replied Obi-Wan, himself fumbling with Anakin’s upper layer of clothing.

Mostly undressed, they stood there for an uncomfortable moment, and then they kissed again, heavily, fiercely, each touch like electricity. Obi-Wan's skin broke out into goose pimples.

Anakin reached over and untied Obi-Wan’s leggings, fumbling a bit as he tried to pull them down and then undid his own with shaking hands, pulling them off and throwing them on the floor. The spent a second staring at one another, the Force wreathing around them like the growing storm.

They’d seen each other naked before, many times, but somehow this was different, more awkward and fully charged. After giving him the look a man dying in the desert gives water, Anakin pushed Obi-Wan to the bed and climbed on top of him.

“I’ve never done this before” Anakin said.

Obi-Wan paused for a moment. “Sex or sex with a man?”

“With a man,” Anakin replied as he hovered over him, chest to chest, belly to belly. He kissed along Obi-Wan’s neck and along his clavicle, biting ever so gently, then rubbed his erection against Obi-Wan’s own, the friction nearly unbearable. After a brief eternity, he took Obi-Wan’s length in his flesh hand.

It was a little clumsy but oh so intense, with the Force was almost sparking from Anakin’s fingers. Obi-Wan had been waiting for this for so long, as only the Force knew. Anakin paused and gave him an unsure look.

“Ah Anakin, sweet one. Don’t fucking stop.”

“I’ve watched porn vids,” Anakin said as he moved lower, taking Obi-Wan into his sweet, clever mouth, lips pink and full around his cock.

Obi-Wan could only respond with a wordless sound, and for once in a long while, words completely escaped him. He was so tired yet so wound up that he could no longer think. He’d just ride the wave of this till it crashed, whether on a soft beach or on rocks. Any semblance of control was gone and he’d let Anakin do as he liked as some kind of penance. He sat up a little and wreathed his fingers into Anakin’s hair as he brought him to shuddering orgasm.

Anakin wiped his mouth then crawled up beside Obi-Wan as he lay there panting with stars in his eyes. Anakin was flushed pink, forehead beaded with sweat, pupils dilated, almost glowing in the dim light. Obi-Wan had never seen him so beautiful before.

“I want to fuck you. I want to feel that you’re real. That you didn’t leave me,” Anakin said, as he ran his finger down Obi-Wan’s heaving chest. Obi-Wan thought that if it was Anakin’s first time, it would be better that way anyway.

“Will it hurt you?” Anakin asked.

“Only a little,” Obi-Wan said once he could form words.

“Mmh,” said Anakin, thoughtfully. It was hard to tell if that was a good or bad thing. Likely some of both.

Anakin reached over to the bedside table and pulled out a container of salve, as Obi-Wan slid a pillow under his back and tried to control his breathing. Anakin coated a finger and then slowly inserted one finger, then two. Before Obi-Wan’s muddled mind could react, Anakin was pushing inside of him. It hurt like hell.

He gasped and gripped the sheets with his hands. It had been a while since he’d done this particular act. Maybe more direction had been needed, but given the week’s events, he deserved this pain. He let it fill his body and mind. The sharp acuity of it was a potent distraction.

Anakin froze above him. “I’m hurting you.”

“Just go slow. It’s all right, my dearest one.” Anakin needed encouragement and praise as he always did. Obi-Wan reached up and brushed damp hair from his smooth forehead.

Anakin’s face softened and he paused a minute, giving Obi-Wan a look that could have reversed the planet’s orbit. He waited until Obi-Wan relaxed and then moved against him, first slowly, and then faster. Obi-Wan let out a shuddering gasp as he hit his prostate. Encouraged, Anakin pushed on with increasing intensity until climax, then fell against him, lost in his orgasm. They lay there, entwined in each other, panting, echoes of the other’s pleasure reverberating in their minds.

Anakin rolled off of him, and lay beside him, twining their fingers together. Obi-Wan suddenly felt his old friends come to visit him, mainly guilt and doubt. Anakin wasn’t himself, or Quinlan, or Garen, or Siri. He didn’t have fuckbuddies. Obi-Wan’s head shook with the implications. What had he done? He’d always prided himself in being in control, but he wasn’t anymore. He failed in that spectacularly. By giving in to his basest feelings, he may have brought about their ruin.

He was distracted from these dark thoughts by Anakin’s sweet, fond regard. His hair was damp with sweat and curling around his head like a halo. He was beyond lovely, something far more than beautiful, inner fire ablaze even in this intimate moment.

Anakin gently ran a finger along the side of his chest, skating over his ribs. “You need to eat more, old man.”

“Anakin, weren’t you just calling me soft not that long ago? No matter, I could say same to you. The war wears on us.”

Anakin always looked thin, his narrow waist tapering from straight, lovely shoulders.

“I guess… I just want it to be over. I just want you and… everyone to be safe.”

Anakin lay down beside him and twined his arms and legs around him. It was hot and not the most comfortable, but the gesture was sweet. Anakin quickly started to softly snuffle, the clear indication that he was asleep. His growing exhaustion, courtesy of the interminable war, prevented any further introspection, at least for now.

The next morning, Obi-Wan slipped out before Anakin woke up and hid in a deep corner of the archives. He didn’t leave a note. He’d try to meditate these feelings away. They never really spoke about it again, which in retrospect was a mistake. So many mistakes.

* * *

IG-86-D5 was Lord Vader’s personal sentinel droid. He’d personally retrieved him from a pile of scrap and rebuilt him to his own specifications. Lord Vader addressed him as Dee5.

He had the honor of meeting with Lord Vader in his personal chambers aboard his star destroyer. The Lord sat in a large, synth-leather chair, watching the stars through a viewport. He’d removed his helmet, revealing a young male humanoid with short brown hair and fine features. He seemed to have some difficulty with air exchange. Another human male, dark-haired and sturdy with a scar on the left side of his face, stood in the shadows in the corner of the room.

Lord Vader’s voice was softer and higher pitched without the vocoder in his helmet. Dee5 waited patiently for his command.

“You are to find the man whose images I programmed you with. His name is Obi-Wan Kenobi. You are absolutely not to kill or harm him.”

“Master, I am an assassin droid.”

“I know, but you are also intelligent. Can you do this?”

“Yes.”

“Good. Once you find him, you will report back to my associate through the frequency I provided you. I will then provide you with further instruction,” Lord Vader said, pointing to the silent man in the corner of the room.

“Dee5, this is a reconnaissance mission. It may be that you find nothing. Even small pieces of information on this man are important to me. He will be hard to find.”

Lord Vader turned towards D5, away from the viewport. “You serve me and me alone. You will send regular transmissions to my associate, who I trust implicitly. He will be your contact and will report to me. If the Emperor or any other officer of the Empire gets its hands on you, you will self-destruct. The Emperor will also be interested in finding this man as will others. He has an enormous price on his head.”

He put his helmet back on and stood up, walking over to Dee5 and placing a hand on his shoulder as a gesture of solidarity, then Lord Vader gestured for Dee5 to leave. Just before Dee5 left the room, Lord Vader said one last thing. “Oh, and Dee5, do not leak any of this to the Emperor or his men. I wouldn’t want to melt you for scrap.”

That conversation had taken place some months ago, and Dee5 had been looking diligently. He’d obtained from Lord Vader’s associate a list of all the planets the man had been known to have visited in the last twenty years, and he’d started with the more remote planets, especially those in the outer rim. As Dee5 was a droid, he did not need to sleep, so he made excellent time. So far, though, he had found nothing.

After fruitless searching, Dee5 came upon a lead on the Outer Rim desert planet of Tatooine.  
After aggressive interrogations at a drinking establishment, he’d found that there was an odd sort of hermit who frequented this place occasionally. Generally wore a brown hood, and could have fit the description of the man he was looking for.

Dee5 finally learned that the man went by ‘Ben’ from a Twi’lek who sold moonshine. Lord Vader had told him that ‘Ben’ was a potential alias for his target. The Twi’lek had informed him that he believed this man lived out in an area called the ‘Judland Wastes’. Dee5 went back to his ship and studied a topographic map of the planet, locating this place.

Dee5 found a man who could certainly be his target. He thought it best to observe him for a while, taking pictures and watching his movements. He didn’t want to disappoint Lord Vader with a false lead.

A few days later, a female Togruta had visited the hut. She didn’t stay long the first time, but the second time she’d taken his target. She didn’t seem to want to kill him but she had injected him with a substance and brought him to a waiting ship. Not to be thwarted, he’d planted a tracker on the vessel. He would find them and get a better look at the man. Now, he had to wait to see where they landed.

* * *

Back on the freighter, Ahsoka and Rex came out of hyperspace in the vicinity of Polis Massa. Ahsoka walked back to check on Obi-Wan, who remained a very dim presence in the Force. She’d been straining to pick up any hint of him waking, yet nothing had come to her. Frowning, she approached the cot and the med droid turned its head towards her.

“Has he shown any signs of waking up?”

“No. The patient remains deeply unconscious. Numerous organ systems are approaching failure.”

“Failure? From what?” Ahsoka peered down at Obi-Wan who looked horrifyingly ashen and fragile, still as a corpse. She reached out with her mind and could feel only the tiniest flicker of life within him.

“That is beyond my programming. I have informed you that this male human requires advanced medical care. I have done what I can.”

“Kriff this, you ridiculous barve. You can’t die now,” Ahsoka said as she reached down and shook his shoulder.

He felt cool to the touch. She knelt down beside the cot and lay her hand on his chest. She was no Force healer but maybe she could do a little good. Centering her mind, she reached out with the Force and focused on visualizing that little flicker of life within him. She imagined it as a flame in her mind and pictured that flame getting bigger, like stoking a fire.

 A few hours later, she was startled out her trance by R2 butting up against her, letting out a low whine. She felt strangely dizzy, like when she and some of her fellow padawan’s had obtained a bottle of Corellian brandy. She stood and the room spun and then righted itself.

Obi-Wan’s Force presence felt just a little brighter. It had to be enough. Rex popped his head around the door and gave her a worried look.

“We’re approaching Polis Massa. About to begin the landing sequence. Are you all right?”

Ahsoka rubbed at the bridge of her nose. “Yes, just overextended myself. We have to get Obi-Wan to the Med Center soon.”

Rex peered thoughtfully at their patient. “I agree, Sir, he doesn’t look so good.”

Ahsoka nodded and followed Rex in the cockpit. They found a relatively flat spot to land on the outskirts of the main settlement, then flew the shuttle in closer to the Med Center. Rex, with Luke in tow, would go stock up on supplies while Ahsoka took care of Obi-Wan.

They found an old anti-grav sled in the cargo hold and Ahsoka used it to bring him in. The triage droid took one look at Obi-Wan and ushered them down several sterile, white corridors until they reached a large well-lit room with transparisteel walls, filled with extensive medical equipment she couldn’t quite identify and a bacta tank.

Ahsoka stood in the corner as the droids attached monitors, scanned him, and took various samples. They burbled to themselves in a language she didn’t understand. Taking some deep breaths, she tried to will away her fear and anxiety. Obi-Wan had to live. The plan wouldn’t work without him. He had to live. After a few minutes, she was ushered to a waiting area where she sat impatiently, trying not to huff.

Meanwhile, in the shadow of a rock spire on the Dune Sea, Dee5’s tracker alerted him to the new location of the freighter and his possible target. Polis Massa. The hunt was on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is obviously a work in progress; I will update as my schedule allows :D
> 
> Huge thanks to my dear friend and beta picavenger14- this couldn't have happened without her help and cheerleading!
> 
> Thank you so much for reading! If you'd like, let me know what you think! I always appreciate it c:
> 
> I'm darthplodder on tumblr if you'd like to say hi.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We rejoin our heroes on Polis Massa....

“Miss, wake up. I need to talk to you.”

Ahsoka startled awake, a little disoriented. She was still in a hard chair in the empty waiting room at the med center. After rubbing her scratchy eyes, she looked up and saw a pale violet-blue Twi’lek woman in doctors’ garb peering down at her. The last two days had been spent wandering in and out of this waiting area, listlessly eating at the small commissary, and hoping for any news. Thoroughly exhausted, she’d eventually fallen asleep.

Ahsoka studied the woman hovering above her. She was middle aged with delicate features. There were fine lines visible around her luminous eyes and mouth, and she held an aura of calm intensity that reminded her of Master Ti, vast and deep as a still ocean.

“Awake now? I need to talk to you about the man that you brought here. I’m Dr. Bril. Nima Bril,” she said briskly, tips of her lekku twitching just a little.

Ahsoka rubbed her eyes and sat up straight in the chair, and Nima took that as an invitation to sit next to her. Thankfully, Ahsoka’s addled mind still remembered her new alias. “Shota. What’s going on?”

“First of all, how do you know this man?” she asked, eyes boring into Ahsoka like she was trying to ascertain her innermost secrets. Despite this, something about her presence felt reassuring and grounding.

“He’s a close family friend... Um, a mentor. A friend of my fathers,” Ahsoka said, sticking as close as she could to the facts. She hoped that sounded plausible. Part of her just wanted to tell the truth.

Nima’s face remained inscrutable. “And how did he get to be in this sorry condition?”

Nine kriffing hells. She should have thought more about a backstory for Master Obi-Wan instead of napping. Ahsoka hoped she wasn’t backpedaling too terribly. “He, um, he got in trouble with some Hutts and went into hiding on Tatooine. He lost some people he loved, and it doesn’t seem like he was handling it well. I found him like this.”

“Hutts or the Empire?” Nima asked directly, but with a hint of warmth. “This is the Outer Rim, Shota. None of us are too fond of the Empire out here.”

Ahsoka didn’t answer. Nima looked at her intently and raised a brow ridge. “Come,” she said, standing up and beckoning Ahsoka to follow.

They walked over to a transparisteel panel and studied Obi-Wan, who lay still on the bed with a solitary med droid in attendance. He was attached to several monitors with an intravenous line in each arm. Ahsoka had to muffle a giggle, more out of nerves than anything funny. To add to the absurdity of the situation, they’d cut his hair short and shaved his beard. Aside from the lines in his forehead and around his eyes, he looked strangely young without it. She almost couldn’t bear to look.

“Will he be all right?” Ahsoka asked. He still looked so sick, grey and gaunt.

“Yes, with time. When he arrived he had significant hepatitis, his kidneys were failing, and he was in shock- mostly from profound dehydration and ethanol abuse. He also has heavy metal poisoning from whatever moonshine he’d been drinking. I don’t think it was meant for human consumption,” She stated, keeping Ahsoka locked in her gaze.

“Has he woken up?”

“Briefly. He was quite confused, which is to be expected. He had been heavily sedated with tranqarest, which can only be obtained from criminals and smugglers. What do you know about that?”

Dr. Bril was a tiny person, but Ahsoka felt uneasy. Old habits came back, and she scanned the room trying to find the best escape routes. There really were none.

“I had to. He was thrashing around in the ship, not making any sense. I didn’t want him to hurt himself or anyone else,” Ahsoka said, trying to hide how twitchy she was starting to feel.

The doctor’s face remained expressionless. “I see. Well, the next time you sedate someone, especially someone ill and concussed, don’t use that one. His body couldn’t process the metabolites of the drug. That’s why it’s taking him so long to wake up. It also is a cardiac depressant, which hasn’t helped matters.”

Unease continued to nip at the edges of Ahsoka’s mind. Part of her wanted to grab Master Obi-Wan and bolt, but that probably wouldn’t go very well. She had a sneaking suspicion that the good doctor was much stronger than she looked and wouldn’t let him go without a fight. Plus, he was still so sick, and she had no means to help him.

“Will he get better?” Ahsoka asked.

“Surprisingly yes; he must be very strong.” Nima gave Ahsoka an oddly knowing look. “His organ function is improving, his blood pressure nearly back to normal. He’s quite malnourished, but that isn’t so hard to fix with time.”

Ahsoka wasn’t sure how to read this woman, but something told her that she wouldn’t turn them in to the Empire, that there was a touch of sympathy deep within her eyes.

“You may sit with him if you like. I’ll be back later to check on things. It will alert me if there are any problems,” she said, glancing at the med droid.

The door opened and Ahsoka walked in, sitting by a chair at his bedside. She briefly touched Obi-Wan’s hand and softly said his name. He groaned and mumbled something, but didn’t open his eyes. He was much cleaner, and his skin was warm.

Somewhat relieved, Ahsoka sank back into her chair and shut her eyes. She’d rest for a little bit longer and then com Rex. Even if she was turned in to the Empire, there was nothing she could do about it now. The whole plan rested on Obi-Wan, and he had to get well.

* * *

Falling. He was falling, both literally and figuratively. The sensation of falling continued until he fell into a darkness that was somehow closer to consciousness than he’d been in a while. He thought he heard someone say his name, but it was so far away and he was just so tired. He’d keep his eyes shut for a while longer, just a little while longer.

Far from conscious now, he let his mind wander to memories of the not so far off past. He was lying in a dim room in the cramped officer’s quarters of some flagship, he couldn’t remember the one. It was close to the end, to Mustafar. If he had to admit it, he would have said he was in a strange mood, exhausted beyond measure, and more than a little drunk.

In an fit of nihilism, he’d consumed nearly a whole bottle of Corellian brandy and had not made much effort to metabolize it. At this moment of weakness, the door slid open and Anakin came in. Obi-Wan sighed in annoyance and didn’t make any move to get up.

“Anakin, must you always come into my quarters and pace?” Silly question, but all he wanted was a little peace, a break from the constant noise of war.

“Yes, I can’t sleep,” Anakin said, now leaning against the wall in a lanky slump.

“Why not?”

“My mind is buzzing; I just can’t rest.” Anakin ran a hand through his messy curls, leaving them in a pleasing state of disarray.

Obi-Wan closed his eyes. This would be a long night, but that seemed to be his lot in life. “Why don’t you meditate?”

“Don’t you think I’ve kriffing tried that? I can’t.” Even with his eyes closed, he knew Anakin was pouting.

“I could help you,” Obi-Wan replied, stealing himself to a night of consoling the chosen one. If he was honest with himself, he would say that he didn’t mind.

“I don’t want you to help me meditate. I want you to fuck me.” Anakin said, point blank.

Well, that would wake a person up. Obi-Wan opened his eyes, sat up, and froze in place. He couldn’t quite believe that he’d heard that correctly.

Part of him liked the idea, the drunk, restless part, full of pent up tension. He’d played both roles and liked either, so long as he was in complete control. The only time in recent history that he wasn’t was the last and only time he’d slept with Anakin, and what an mess that had been.

Part of him was begging himself not to do this. This wasn’t Quinlan or Garen. This was Anakin, his former padawan, who didn’t deal well with attachment. Their relationship had been so supercharged lately, and Anakin had been even more restless than usual and somehow more lost. Obi-Wan didn’t know what to do. They should really be talking, not fornicating. He sighed and rubbed a hand down his face.

He knew that that there was talk at the Temple that he was the perfect Jedi. The model Jedi. He found it ridiculous. Looking back on it, he made a decision that was not fitting with that image. It was a poor choice and one born out of the exhaustion and desperation of a long, drawn out war with no end in sight. He couldn’t really blame the brandy, could he?

Anakin approached him where he was sitting on the edge of the cot, and Obi-Wan grabbed him by the hips and pulled him forward, so Anakin was almost straddling his lap. In the Force, Anakin felt like a loose round of ammunition bouncing around the hold of a ship, ready to go off at any second. It was overwhelming.

Obi-Wan made the same mistake he’d made the last time and let his emotions and Anakin’s overwhelm him. He knew it wasn’t right, but Anakin was so beautiful, and strong, and needy. Sometimes it felt good to be needed. Sometimes it felt good to give in, and so he did.

“Are you sure you want this, sweet one?” Obi-Wan said, reaching up and toying with his messy curls. They were a riotous dark gold, more precious than any treasure.

“Yes,” murmured Anakin, leaning hard against his thighs.

Obi-Wan stirred and gently but firmly pushed Anakin and himself up to standing. “Oh, my little one. If you’re sure.”

“I’m sure,” Anakin said, facing him. He was flushed and a little agitated, lips full and plush. Obi-Wan could already feel the hardness of him against his hip.

Maintaining eye-contact with those heavy-lidded blue eyes, Obi-Wan undid Anakin’s belt and undid his trousers, his hands shaking imperceptibly. He pushed his robes off of his shoulders, then leaned into him, pushing him against the wall of the small cell.

“You’re still dressed,” Anakin said, voice husky.

“I’ll get there. You wanted this, so we’ll do it my way. I won’t hurt you. Is that all right?”

“You can hurt me. Just do it.”

“Never, dear heart. I’ll make it good for you.” Obi-Wan said, leaning up onto his toes to frame Anakin’s face with his hands, pulling him in for a kiss. His lips were chapped but so full and soft.

Obi-Wan sucked on the plump bottom one for good measure, and it was oh so sweet in his mouth. The alcohol, the late hour, the tension between the two of them made this seem like a fever dream, almost unreal. The force swirled around them murky and uneasy.

Obi-Wan ghosted his lips along Anakin’s ear down the side of his neck as he shuddered, eventually kissing the dip between his clavicles. His rapid breaths showed off every muscle and curve of his chest and abdomen, more lovely than any sculpture. It felt so good just to let go; to let Anakin’s need be his too, to let it consume him.

Sudden guilt overcame him, quick as a flash flood in the desert. He paused and stepped away, chest heaving. This wasn’t right. Not again. His mind was clouded and muddled by chronic, unrelenting fatigue. Anakin noticed his sudden reluctance and pulled Obi-Wan towards him again, none to gently tugging off Obi-Wan’s loose sleep pants. He was full, aching.

“Bend me over the bed. Fuck me. Be my Master,” Anakin whispered, voice husky.

Obi-Wan shuddered, less in control that he imagined. “You don’t know what you ask of me.”

“Please, Master. Show me.”

And he gave in, doing as Anakin asked, joining with him naked and prone over the narrow cot, driven to near madness by overwhelming sensation and need. It was like giving in to the true fear of heights, which was not the fear of falling, but the fear that you might actually jump. The falling was such sweet bliss.

Afterwards, they lay cramped together on the tiny cot, sweaty, sticky, entirely lost. Anakin was the first one to speak. “I love you, Master,” Anakin said in a low, quiet voice, his gaze intent on the smooth plastiseal ceiling.

The alcohol was losing its edge and now guilt and loathing were creeping into his mind. He didn’t know what to say, more and more often being at a loss for words. He laughed darkly at the thought of his nickname, the Negotiator.

Obi-Wan opened his mouth and said something that was the wrong thing to say. “We shouldn’t have done that. I shouldn’t have… Anakin, it’s not right.”

“Don’t you love me?” Anakin asked, with a hint of simmering anger.

“You are very dear to me, but that kind of love, possessive love, it’s dangerous,” Obi-Wan said, turning on his side to study the man next to him.

“I don’t really see why.”

Obi-Wan tried to hold back an exasperated sigh. “We can’t let this distract us from our duties, the war, the republic, Anakin. It’s not right.”

Anakin turned now, so they were both face to face, and started to toy with his hair. “It doesn’t have to be a distraction.”

Obi-Wan pushed his hand away. “It already is!! This war, it takes all our energy, all our attention.”

“Fuck the war. It isn’t right, Obi-Wan. Something isn’t right. It’s taking our attention from something else. Don’t tell me you haven’t felt it,” Anakin replied, eyes blue, wide, and filled with righteous confidence.

Sometimes Anakin was wise. Why hadn’t he listened?

Anakin continued on. “We should be figuring out what’s really going on.”

Obi-Wan sat up and scrubbed at his face with his hands. “We must do what the council advises.”

This was the wrong answer. Anakin gripped the sheets in his white knuckled hands. “Damn them! They’re just the lackeys of Senate; corrupt bunch of windbags. Look at what they did to Ahsoka! She didn’t deserve any of this. Maybe we should follow her lead.”

“Anakin, you can’t talk like that! We must remain loyal to the Order.” He rubbed at his beard. “Anyway, I’m on the Council. Padme’s a member of the Senate. You’re friends with the Chancellor.”

“I didn’t say you were all terrible… Anyway. It’s wrong. Something is wrong.” Anakin sat up himself, face full of stormy emotion, and started to get dressed.

“Think on it, my Master. I’m going to bed.” With that he left as abruptly as he had come. Obi-Wan had the sinking suspicion that he’d failed some kind of major trial. He had.

Sleepless, he’d mulled over Anakin’s words in his mind. The whole war seemed never ending, one task just replacing the next. Like the Rako Hardeen incident, some of the missions were growing more and more absurd.

Kill Grievous and it would be over. Kill the Zabrak and it would be over. Kill Dooku and it would be over. They could kill them all and someone or something else would just replace them. No end was in sight. Nothing seemed real or meaningful, not anymore. All he could do was think of the Code. There was nothing else.

* * *

While Obi-Wan was undergoing some treatments, Ahsoka sat in an unoccupied waiting room and decided to use this time to com Rex.

“Where are you?”

“Back at the ship. How’s our, um guest?”

“Recovering, but not ready to leave yet. He was in rough shape.”

“Yeah, he looked it. I talked with Gambit.”

Ahsoka frowned, that was always hard on Rex. “What did he say?”

“That Eclipse has a droid following us, well specifically, our guest. It found us on Tatooine and tracked us here. The good news is that it reports to Gambit and he can try to stall it. We’re not ready for a visit from Eclipse yet.”

“No. We aren’t.” The Force is on our side. It has to be, she thought to herself.

“It’s an assassin droid, an IG-86 model. We can’t let it see our guest yet or get a good picture of him until we’re ready and Gambit’s ready. Eclipse can’t find out yet. Keep a close eye on him.”

“I will.”

They ended the call and Ahsoka wandered back to Obi-Wan’s room. She couldn’t leave him alone anymore, not till they left and their plans were underway. No one was there when she returned, and he was sound asleep, curled up on his side.

A few moments later, the doctor returned. She looked at Ahsoka expectantly, lekku twitching just a little. “Come with me, please. I’d like to speak with you.”

Ahsoka tried to plant herself in her chair. “I don’t want to leave him right now.”

The doctor threw one lekku over her shoulder and tilted her head. “I see. What’s his name?”

Uh, think fast Ahsoka. She hadn’t expected him to be unconscious during her plan and she was an admittedly terrible actor.

“Ben. Ben, um, Vos.”

“Well, I need to speak with you regarding Mr. Vos. Privately. He’s quite safe for right now,” she said, with a look that would not bear further questioning.

Not wanting to make a scene quite yet, Ahsoka followed reluctantly into an empty patient’s room. The doctor gestured for Ahsoka to sit on a chair while she sat on the cot.

“Can you explain please,” she said, her voice like ice, “why you have, in your possession, a drugged, poisoned, and apparently starved Jedi Master?”

Ahsoka tried to keep her screaming thoughts internal. “I didn’t do those things to him, except for the drugged part! I didn’t want to hurt him! I just wanted his help.”

“He was the High General of the Order. Did you think that even in this sorry state he wouldn’t be recognized?” Dr. Bril crossed her arms firmly across her chest.

“He was sick! I had to take him somewhere.” Ahsoka looked at the door and thought about bolting.

Nima reached across and put her hand on Ahsoka’s shoulder, her expression a little softer.  
“Shota, if that’s your name, I’m not going to turn him or you into the Empire. I just want to know the truth.” She stood up and opened the shade over a small transparisteel pane, looking out at the dark sky around them.

Ahsoka could feel something she hadn’t before, a warm and steady presence in the force. The doctor was a force user who had been heavily shielding.

“You are a Jedi?”

“I was, I suppose that I still am. I was a healer. I managed to escape the purge. I happened to be on Ryloth when it happened, and blended into the crowds,” she said, walking back over to the bed and sitting down. “Now child, tell me your story, from the beginning.”

So Ahsoka did. From the very beginning as she knew it, from her apprenticeship onwards to the bitter end. She told Nima her plans. It was kind of a relief. She hoped she hadn’t made a huge mistake talking to this woman, but she didn’t feel she had much of a choice. She didn’t feel Sithly and hadn’t killed Master Obi-Wan.

Nima laughed a little and smiled for the first time Ahsoka had seen. “That’s an ambitious plan, child.”

“I guess it is, but no one else has anything better. When will he be able to leave?”

Nima rested her hand on Ahsoka’s shoulder. “Weeks from now, maybe.”

“Weeks? We can’t sit here for weeks.” They’d certainly be caught if they stayed in one place for too long.

Nima gave Ahsoka a thoughtful look, eyes soft. “I know of one way we could speed things up and that would be a benefit to your party overall.”

“What’s that?”

The doctor locked Ahsoka directly in her dark violet gaze. “Take me with you.”

Ahsoka hadn’t been expecting that, but she thought it would be a good idea. They were going to a new base for the rebellion which was still under construction. They would need a healer/medic and what did they have to lose?

“It won’t be easy and we’ll probably all die,” Ahsoka said.

Nima stood up again and stretched a little, unphased. “That would be preferable to rotting here for the rest of my life.”

“I’ll have to ask my partners, but I think it’ll be fine.”

Nima walked back to the door and opened it. “Excellent. He still needs 4 or 5 days here, then he’ll be able to leave under my care. He certainly won’t be well yet.”

Ahsoka got up to follow her. “I understand.”

“Thank you, Ahsoka. I’m sorry to frighten you. You can go back to him now.”

Ahsoka gave her a wary smile and went back to sit with Obi-Wan. She could see that he was starting to stir a little, mumbling quietly. His eyes opened suddenly, unfocused and grey as slate.

“Luke!!!” He shouted, in a voice raspy with disuse.

Obi-Wan sat up quickly and tried to swing his legs out of the bed, but then went pale, eyes rolling back in his head. Ahsoka rocketed out of her chair and caught him as he swayed on the cot. She helped him lay back down, adjusting the head of the bed so he could sit up just a little.

“Easy there! He’s safe. You’ve been really sick. You can’t sit up that fast,” Ahsoka said, patting his hand.

Obi-Wan reopened bleary eyes and peered at her muzzily. “Ahsoka?”

“Yes, it’s me.”

“Where are we?” He asked, voice dry and gravelly with disuse.

“Polis Massa.”

Obi-Wan looked utterly bewildered as he peered at her and then around the room. He reached out and grabbed her hand. “You’re real. Were you real before? Did I see you on Tatooine?” he asked, coughing a little.

She squeezed his hand back, thankful that it was still warm. “Um, yeah. A lot has happened, Master Obi-Wan.”

“That seems to be an understatement. Is there any water?” He grimaced as he rubbed his beardless chin, then wiggled to sit up a little more.

Ahsoka got up and handed him the cup of ice water sitting on the bedside table and handed it to him. He spilled it all over himself with his shaking hands. Feeling distinctly uncomfortable, Ahsoka took the cup from and helped him to drink. Kriff, he still had a long recovery ahead of him; she’d never seen him brought so low. She couldn’t bear to think of it.

After the water, he gave her a small, weary smile and lay back against the bed. Ahsoka was hoping that she’d be able to explain everything then and there, but Obi-Wan was exhausted by his efforts and immediately dozed off as soon as his head hit the bed. She gave a huff of impatience to no one in particular and sat back in the chair to wait, not looking forward to the conversation.

Hours later, he stirred again, and turned his head towards her. “Ahsoka, you’re still here. Sometimes I’m not sure of these things.” His eyes looked a little clearer this time. “I’m so glad that you’re safe. But how…?”

“I’m really here. Luke’s with Rex. He’s safe too.”

His face reflected nothing but bewilderment. “Rex? Stars end, I’m missing something. Kindly explain how we arrived here?”

Ahsoka took a deep breath and told him the plan, from the beginning. There was no time for anything other than honesty, and she was ready to face his anger. She explained her impromptu kidnapping, taking him and Luke with the eventual plan to abduct Vader and somehow seduce him back to the light, or at least convince him to kill the Emperor.

Obi-Wan reacted in a way she never expected. He closed his eyes and laughed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!!
> 
> I really appreciate all your kind words, and I love to hear what you have to say :D
> 
> Thanks to picavenger14 for her wonderful help with this project; I couldn't do it without her!
> 
> Anakin/Vader as well as another key player will make an appearance in the next chapter!
> 
> darthplodder on Tumblr if you want to yell


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been very busy and having motivational issues, but here's the next chapter! 
> 
> I hope you enjoy :D

Obi-Wan startled Ahsoka by laughing, and laughing till he started to cough and gasp a little and the monitor above the bed emitted a shrill, insistent beeping. It didn’t seem like he was laughing out of humor, but out of the beginnings hysteria and desperation. Ahsoka froze in her seat, stunned by his reaction. Shaking herself out of it, she got up and helped him with the water glass, the light in the dim room casting shadows on the hollows of his face.

Gently, Ahsoka supported his head, noting the strange soft-coarse feel of human hair under her fingers. His lips had an odd violet hue to them, eyes glazed over. A med droid zipped into the room, ‘hands’ on its hips.

“Please stop disturbing the patient. Oxygen levels are dropping,” it burbled as it applied an oxygen cannula under Obi-Wan’s nose. “You must stay calm,” it admonished, turning its head towards Obi-Wan.

He lay back against the bed to catch his breath while the droid studied the monitor. Once it seemed pleased with the numbers, it whirred back out. Obi-Wan turned his head towards her, looking less unhinged. “I’m sorry Ahsoka. I reacted poorly. It was very brave of you to try this.” He reached out and took her hand in his own. “I’m glad you’re well, little one.”

She guessed that they were the same height now, but didn’t point that out. “I thought you’d be mad at me,” Ahsoka stated.

“I was; I am.” He frowned thoughtfully. “I should be furious, but I can’t. Danger would find Luke eventually, even on Tatooine.” He met her eyes directly, his now the clearest she’d seen since they’d arrived. “But Ahsoka, this plan. It can’t work. It won’t work.”

Ahsoka pulled her hand away. “Why not? The galaxy can’t go on like this. We can’t let a Sith win. We’ll all be slaves.”

Obi-Wan gave her a soft, gentle look, impossibly sad. “He’s already won. Stars know that I loved Anakin, that I was attached to him in the worst way, but he’s turned, he’s gone. Darth Vader is what’s left,” he said, pausing for a moment to catch his breath.

“I’m gone too in some ways, at least as you knew me. His betrayal killed what I was, just as he killed our Order. This is all that’s left.” He pointed to his ill, ravaged body and coughed again, softly.

Ahsoka felt her chest tighten. “I don’t believe that. I don’t believe that once you fall you can never come back. That’s stupid.” Ahsoka got up to refill the water, turning away from him for a moment. This was hard. “Anyway, he loved you. I’m sure that he still does, he’s just scared and confused.”

Obi-Wan raised an elegant ginger brow. “He certainly chose a rather dramatic way to show it. Anyway, do you think that after I cut off his legs and abandoned him on Mustafar that he’ll want to even look at me? The only thing on his mind will be murder.”

Ahsoka started a little. “Cut off his legs? What happened, Master? I left the Order and then everything fell apart.”

“That’s an understatement,” Obi-Wan said, frowning

“Bail Organa told me that the two of you fought, but he didn’t know all the details. I still can’t believe that you tried to kill each other.”

“When Order 66 happened, and I felt my fellow Jedi, my friends, all fade into the Force, something cracked inside me. I was addled, not thinking clearly. When I saw the footage of Anakin...” He let out a ragged breath, almost like a sob, and continued on, “in the temple, I broke completely. Yoda convinced me to confront him and I obeyed blindly. I convinced myself it was the right thing.”

As he spoke he seemed to go more ashen, eyes glassy. The monitor above started to chirp again, though not as loud. Obi-Wan closed his eyes and relaxed his clenched hands. Ahsoka could feel him growing more dim in the Force again. It was probably enough for now. Ahsoka had felt it too, felt the deaths, but not as much. She had already said her goodbyes to the Order and made a new life for herself, and she was so much younger.

He opened his eyes again and tried to focus them on her, obviously fighting the urge to sleep. “Later Ahsoka, later. I’ll show you. I don’t think I can bring myself to put it into words. Let me rest a while, and then we’ll meditate together,” Obi Wan said, then shut his eyes, nearly immediately asleep or unconscious.

* * *

CC-2224 sat alone in his small office off of Vader’s quarters. The only light was from the console in front of him, illuminating the rugged crags and hollows of his face. He rubbed at his short-clipped hair, the images in front of him bringing back the worst of his memories and his darkest thoughts.

Commander Cody was his old name, and though Vader still called him Cody, he didn’t command anything, not since he’d tried to kill his General. Every day, the memory of him dropping like a stone into that sink hole on Utapau returned to haunt him.

After the fall of the Republic, he’d become Vader’s confidant of sorts. Vader had secretly arranged for Cody to have his inhibitor chip removed as a reward for his loyalty. Once Skywalker became the Emperor’s pet, Cody had kept as close as possible, trying to protect him and even comfort him as best as could. Skywalker, well Vader now, was all he had left of the past. He became Vader’s personal assistant, bodyguard, secretary, confidant, sometimes enforcer, and companion.

The Emperor used and mistreated Vader. It was clear to Cody and he suspected that Vader thought this as well, even if he wouldn’t admit it. After his wounding, Cody knew that he hadn’t been healed properly. Vader was fed with a tube instead of by mouth because he wouldn’t eat, not because he couldn’t. The Emperor wanted to keep him alive as a symbol, more an attack dog than apprentice, a thug to keep the galaxy in line.

Cody would go on to serve Vader out of respect to his General who had adored him, but he would never serve the Emperor. Not after what he done to his brothers, to the Jedi, especially the one he’d loved. He’d loved two people in his life, Rex, his closest brother of brothers, and his Jedi. He would gladly die for both of them.

It wasn’t sexual love, no, he’d never really felt it, at least not that he was aware of. Cody only knew two things for certain, that he’d gladly serve as a double agent for them and that he would welcome any torture the Emperor inflicted upon him, as long as it kept them safe.

In a seedy bar on Nar Shaddaa, he’d found Rex and Ahsoka. Cody had accompanied Vader on a mission to get information on any remaining Jedi who had escaped the purge. Vader had allowed him some alone time, and he’d felt that a drink was in order.

Entering the bar, his eyes had darted around the room, searching his surroundings for any threats, scanning the dark corners and booths where beings sat. No one paid him much notice, an ex-clone trooper in civilian clothes. About to take a seat at the bar, he’d spied them in the far corner. Rex had stopped dying his hair, but Cody would still know him blind.

Cody immediately turned and walked out of the bar, briskly, but not running. He didn’t want any unwanted attention. He snuck around to the alley in the back and bent over, gasping, expelling the contents of his stomach. He stayed there for a moment, hands on his thighs, then leaned against the wall of the building, breaths heaving. Disturbed by his presence, small rodents scurried away.

Hearing soft voices and footsteps approaching, Cody knew it was them, but didn’t run again. He didn’t know what Rex would do to him, push him against the wall, punch his teeth out, or something else he deserved, but Rex didn’t do any of those things.

Rex had grabbed him by the shoulders and pulled Cody into a tight embrace. Startled, Cody stiffened, but then relaxed into it. “Kriffing hells, Cody, I thought you were dead,” Rex had said.

“Not quite,” Cody replied. Rex released him, then held him at arm’s length. “Are you well?”

“Well enough, more than I deserve,” Cody said. He’d explained to them his new role, and begged them to leave Nar Shaddaa before Vader found them.

“Do you serve the Empire?” Rex had asked, point blank.

“Never. I serve…him. And myself. No one else,” Cody said.

“Help us then. We need someone on this inside, please Cody,” Ahsoka said, her face earnest and intense as always, blue eyes pleading.

He had nothing to lose and no one else to let down, other than these two. Rex, dearer than a brother, and Ahsoka, still so young but so brave. He didn’t care what happened, as long as these two were safe, and the Emperor was annihilated.

“I’ll do whatever you need,” Cody said. They’d exchanged encrypted frequencies and discussed code names, then disappeared into the foggy, dim night.

Even now, he wondered how they’d been lucky enough to meet that evening. Ahsoka said it was the Force, and after everything he’d seen his General do in the past years, he knew it was true. Thinking on their ridiculous plan, Cody thought that it might just work. He saw every day and night how lonely, bitter, and frightened Vader was. The Emperor did not show him any true affection or support, which he had always seemed to crave.

That had been months ago. Mind back in the present, he studied images that Dee-5 had transmitted, images that were terrifying. Though out of focus and grainy, the location was clearly a desert, and the target was an unconscious, still man with reddish hair and beard. It was hard to make out his features, but the general build was about right. Cody shuddered a little bit. Vader could not see these yet.

Dee-5 had contacted him and transmitted the images, letting him know that the target had been taken to Polis Massa. After speaking with Rex, he’d learned that his General was ill, and not ready for the plan to go into effect yet. They’d need to get to the base on Saijo first. Cody was patient; he could wait.

* * *

Ahsoka waited impatiently until Obi-Wan again woke up, a few interminable hours later. She helped him drink some water and some kind of nutritional drink. It seemed to help, he had just a hint of color return to his face.

“Ahsoka, you’re still here,” Obi-Wan said.

“Of course I am!” she huffed. “You said you’d show me, and you owe it to me.”

She pulled her chair closer to the bed beside him and he reached out and gently touched her cheek. “That I did, and I will. But are you ready for this?” he asked.

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

“You will see things… you will see your old master in a new light. Ahsoka, it will be hard. Try to remember him as he was, not as this monster that was twisted and broken by a master Sith manipulator.”

“Yes. I’m ready. I need to know,” Ahsoka said.

He studied her face, his own features arranged into his old placid, unreadable mask. “I would think that we still share at least a rudimentary training bond? I never broke it.”

“Yeah, probably. Neither did I.” Ahsoka had always looked up to her Grandmaster. He was steady and reliable, and secretly just as impulsive as her own master. Sure, she had been angry with him, for not defending her more, for not protecting her, but somehow she’d forgiven him.

He had been a hero, larger than life, trying to do what he thought was best and follow the Code he still had believed in. Seeing him so diminished, a frail shadow lying in this bed on an outer rim asteroid, was almost more than she could take. She looked into his eyes now and saw some of his old quiet determination. Things weren’t completely lost.

He held out his hand to her and she took it. It was still rough and warm, the callouses from saber use still present. “Drop your shields little one, and sink into the Force. Focus on our bond, and I’ll share my memories with you. As I said, some of it will be hard to stomach.”

Ahsoka closed her eyes and allowed her shields to fall, focusing on her Grandmaster’s force signature. He still felt dim but somehow strong, a candle illuminating a dark room full of hidden shadows and depths. She followed the candle’s light till it became brighter and brighter, and she was now standing on a planet of dark rock and fire. Mustafar.

An involuntary shudder came over her as she saw the world through Obi-Wan’s eyes. They stood on uneven terrain split by rivers of lava and fire, the ground breaking up around them. Flames fell from the sky.

She nearly broke out of the meditation when she saw him. Anakin. Skyguy. Her former master with burning red-rimmed gold eyes which echoed the flames around him. He was full of terrifyingly self-righteous determination with a hint of unhinged uncertainty.

Senator Amidala lay on the ground by her ship, tossed aside like a child’s forgotten plaything, a broken doll, unmoving. Ahsoka tried not to cry out. He had warned her. She could feel her Grandmaster’s horror, his sense of betrayal and unbearable loss. They screamed at each other. She couldn’t remember the words.

The fight that ensued was brutal and spectacular, moving too quickly to comprehend, beautiful yet horribly wrong. She saw her master fly through the air and felt the blade go through his thighs, cutting through muscle and bone as easy as breathing. Hot fire and pain burned through her. Dropping his hand, she screamed and there was the sound of alarms going off in the distance. She slumped over and things went mercifully black.

Ahsoka woke up a moment later, expecting the world to still be burning up around her, with alarms blaring in the distance, but reality returned. The flames were gone, and she was slumped over in her chair in that room on Polis Massa. She shook her head a little to try to clear her mind. The ringing sound continued, and a flurry of activity took over the room.

Dr. Bril and two med droids rushed in and the insistent ringing grew louder.

“Ahsoka, what in the stars is going on?” She asked, briskly pushing her out of the way.

Ahsoka noticed that Master Obi-Wan was shaking, his eyes rolled back in his head, paler than the sheet he lay on with beads of sweat forming on his forehead. The monitor was a jagged mess of chaotic lines. Nima grabbed a hypospray from one of the droids and shoved it into his neck, then lay her hands on his forehead and closed her eyes. The room stilled to silence as she worked.

She ushered the med droids out for a minute and plopped down on the corner of the bed, clearly exhausted. “Ahsoka! What have you done?”

“He, uh, he was trying to show me something. It was something I needed to understand.”

“It’s not the time or the place for this. For one, you could have killed him. Secondly, the despair pouring out of the both of you could send every Force Sensitive in the sector this way. Don’t do that again. His shields are shit.” Nima’s head fell into her hands.

Ahsoka slumped into her chair, taken aback, surprised to hear the proper doctor use profanities. Nima was clearly as exhausted as Ahsoka felt, the skin around her eyes grey and lined. Ahsoka hadn’t wanted to hurt him, but she also had to understand what she was working against.

“I’m sorry, Master Bril. I know it hurt him, but I’m not sorry. I needed to know what happened. I have to make this plan work.”

She expected the doctor to be angry, but Nima just sighed and gave her a small smile. “I suppose we do what we must. Tell me the next time? I can support him and help shield. And please, call me Nima.”

“I can do that. I guess I should have told you.” Ahsoka scrubbed at her tired, itchy eyes. Despite her fatigue, she felt restless and on edge.

“Come with me to eat, Ahoska. He’ll be here when you get back. He’s no good to you right now, anyway,” Nima said, standing and walking towards the door.

Ahsoka looked at Obi-Wan, who lay unmoving, head lolling to the side on the pillow. He looked slightly better than a corpse. “No, I guess not.” She got up and followed.

When Ahsoka returned a few hours later, Master Obi-Wan was awake again, propped up in bed. The remnants of a meal of horrid nutritional gruel sat in front of him. It almost made her nostalgic for the Temple, but then she shuddered. No, nothing would make her want to go back to the Halls.

A droid took the tray away, and Ahsoka sat back in her usual chair. Despite the day’s events, he did look better, eyes clear with a hint of their old spark. “Hello old friend, or I should say young friend? We didn’t get very far, did we?”

“No Master, we didn’t.”

His face softened into lines of profound sadness at the use of that word, but he didn’t correct her. “Don’t you see? He’ll never forgive me. We... we betrayed each other completely.”

“We’ll figure that out when we get to it; when we capture him. Anyway, I think he’ll forgive you.”

Obi-Wan shrugged. “Why? He wasn’t really the forgiving sort.”

“He needs you. He hung on your every word. He wanted your approval so badly, Master. He’ll want you back.”

Obi-Wan frowned, brows drawn inward. “Ahsoka…”

She felt her voice getting higher, louder and she rose to standing, hands balled in fists against her side. “Don’t you get it? He’s lost without you.” She took a moment to center her emotions and stop her voice from shaking. “I know it. He’ll come around. There’s no way he’s getting what he needs from the Emperor.”

He paused for a moment, lost in thought. “You may be right,” Obi-Wan said.

Ahsoka realized that she probably looked ridiculous and sat back down. “I know I am. Can you tell me what happened next? After you, um, removed a few limbs.”

Everything was so confusing. She was mad at her Master for the horrific things he done and infuriated at Obi-Wan for maiming him and hiding like a wraith in the desert. Everything was a mess, but she would fix it.

“I suppose I’m as ready as I’ll ever be. Ahsoka, I’m sorry. I didn’t handle this well.”

“No one was prepared for dealing with an insane genius Sith Lord and An… My Master’s fall. No training for that in the Crèche. Please, tell me.”

Obi-Wan smiled a little, then rubbed at his stubbled chin. At least his beard was growing back. That would give her just a tiny bit of normalcy.

“After the duel ended, he lay there, so close to the lava. It started to burn his back. The smell… I just couldn’t bear it. I couldn’t bear the thought of it touching his beautiful face.”

He paused and took a sip of water. “I ran down to him and grabbed him by the shoulders and carried him to safer ground. He was screaming at me, hissing and spitting like a wild thing. I set him down on the path away from the fire… Ahsoka, I didn’t know what to do. I, I wasn’t myself. I could feel Senator Amidala’s life force weaken and I panicked. I just left him there, howling, and I took her away.”

“To this very Med Center, right?” Ahsoka asked.

“Yes. The children were born and she, she just slipped away. I was heartsick and bewildered. I didn’t know what to do. I kept imagining Anakin laying there, suffering. It became unbearable.”

“What did you do?”

“I snuck away. Before Senator Organa and Yoda arrived, I took Padme’s ship back to Mustafar. I knew she wouldn’t mind, but I had wronged her so terribly at this point anyway that it didn’t matter.”

He paused here, and reached for the water again, which was empty. Ahsoka filled the glass, studying his face. He was starting to look grey again, slightly tremulous.

“Are you feeling ok? Do you want to stop?” She didn’t really want to face Nima’s wrath again.

“It’s fine. Give me just a moment.” He drank some more of the water, and splashed it on his face, and settled himself in bed.

“I went back to the same spot, near the mining facility. I wanted so bad just to pick him up and sooth him, hold him tight. But when I got there, he was gone. I felt this terrible presence, dark and heavy, far different than Anakin’s own. The Force was screaming at me, Ahsoka. The Sith had been there. Sidious.”

“Ok, Master, but don’t you see? You still love him. You went back for him!” There was hope, Ahsoka could see it.

He looked at her almost blankly, lost in his own grief, then looked down as he studied his hands. “I did.”

Ahsoka felt the strength of her conviction growing like a flame within her. She took his thin hand and squeezed it tight, forcing him to look back at her. “You have to show him that. You have to show him that you still care. He needs you. He needs your approval and support. He always has. I hope you two didn’t think you were hiding that from me.”

He looked away again. “I suppose not. But he’ll likely kill us all before I have a chance to show him.”

She put his hand down and stood up again. “That’s the chance we take! If you die here or die on Tatooine, what’s the difference? If you want to kill yourself, do it in a useful way!”

He looked taken aback. “Ahsoka, I wasn’t trying to…”

She knew she was shouting, but didn’t care. “It certainly looked like you were!!”

Obi-Wan covered his face in his hands and did nothing to refute this statement. She supposed his failure to respond was really his admission. Ahsoka could feel his shame bleeding through his weakened shields and was a little shocked that she’d upset him. His unflappable calm was completely shattered.

After he’d partially centered himself, he tried to set his face back into its usual serene lines. “How do we expect to lure him here and catch him?”

Ahsoka was glad to see a hint of his old self. It was time to plan. “We have a man on the inside.”

* * *

Cody was busy cursing both himself and the pod he was spawned from. Eight karking bloody hells. He’d hid most of the images in encrypted files, but had fallen asleep with one still on the screen in front of him, and of course blasted Vader had to come in and find him and of course, it. At least it was the most blurry one.

Vader had copied the image and had it on his own console, where he was studying it. Cody wondered how long he’d been sitting there, staring at it. “It could be him. It might be him,” Vader said. “On Tatooine.” He started to laugh, the vocoder making it sound terrifying.

Cody stood at attention, trying to appear calm and collected. “It’s very blurry, sir. Hard to make out much of anything. I didn’t want to bother you with something so indistinct. Before Dee-5 could get anything better, some ruffians took this man away. Not to worry, Dee-5 is tracking them. He’s not sure yet where they’ve headed.” Cody hoped Vader didn’t see through his lies.

 “It is promising, Cody. I would like to investigate this myself,” Vader said, standing up and looking at the stars through the viewport. Cody’s heart started to race, sick dread building within him. He tried to keep his face composed.

Vader turned back towards him. “Unfortunately, I cannot. The Emperor has commanded me to end an uprising on Kashyyyk. He expects me to leave immediately. I want you to stay and work on this. Go to investigate yourself if necessary. You know how to contact me.”

Cody tried to not let out his sigh of relief. He had to appear as if nothing was amiss. This plan was as tenuous as a sand castle at high tide, balancing precariously at the ocean’s edge. Vader couldn’t follow them yet. Not until Cody was there himself.

“My Lord, I will do as you ask,” Cody said, bowing his head.

Vader walked over towards him and laid a gloved hand on his arm. Cody tried not to flinch. “Every day I treasure your loyalty, Commander. You have stood by my side when everyone else has failed me.”

Oh, Cody thought, they all had. Obi Wan had left him maimed and alone. Padme was gone. The Emperor had broken all his promises. Cody felt a gaping hole where his heart should be. He tried to convince himself that in the end, this wouldn’t be a betrayal; that it would lead Anakin back to where he belonged.

* * *

“Fulcrum, do you copy?”

Ahsoka roused from her stupor to the sound of Rex’s voice. She had been napping in one of the empty patient rooms. “What is it?”

“I went to one of the local bars to get any info I could and heard rumor that some Imperial Cruisers were headed this way to patrol the outer rim. They’re still looking for Jedi escapees.”

“Damn!”

“Yes, damn. We can’t stay here much longer. I don’t know if it’s true, but we can’t risk it.”

“He’s not ready.”

“Too bad, ‘cause there’s worse news. Eclipse saw a picture that droid took on Tatooine. He’s getting interested. We have to head to the base.”

“Damn,” Ahsoka said.

“Yes, damn again. Get the General as good as he’s going to be and get your medic friend ready to leave for the base. We should go in the next day or so. The ship is stocked.”

Ahsoka suddenly remembered their little charge. “It’s going to be tough, Rex. How’s the little one?”

“He’s easy to please. I think I’m getting the hang of this whole kid thing.”

She almost laughed at the thought of Rex carrying little Luke around on his back while carousing in a seedy bar. “Good. I’ll meet you at the ship as soon as we can,” Ahsoka said, with all the enthusiasm she could muster. It was going to be a long few days. She’d better go find Nima. They had some work to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story has been hard, and I'm really grateful and glad for the comments and kudos I've received!!
> 
> Thank you for reading!! If you'd like, let me know what you think!
> 
> Thanks as always to my friend and beta picavenger14 who is always the best.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoy it!

Obi-Wan was alone, which was odd. No med droids were buzzing around, the Twi’lek doctor and Ahsoka were nowhere to be found. It must mean that he was doing better, or there was some plan underfoot, or perhaps both. He sat cross-legged on his cot, pondering the absurd events that brought him back to this place. So much had been lost here; he could almost see the bewildered ghost of his formal self watching the events proceed in numb horror.

That man was gone now, he’d need to be someone else or fade entirely. Physically, he barely recognized himself. He must have lost his vanity with Anakin’s fall. He was also trying to ignore the fact that he felt as weak as the wobbly bantha calves he’d watched be born on Tatooine.

It felt like years had passed by since they left that den of misery, his planet of self-imposed exile. He still couldn’t fathom that he’d been kidnapped by Ahsoka of all people and dragged here, of all places. A heavy sense of weariness precluded any anger he could have felt towards her. No one else could have invented a plan so audacious, except for the men she’d learned it from. Honestly, he was proud.

Obi-Wan hoped Ahsoka had some kind of plan for the actual capture of Anakin, but then he wasn’t really Anakin anymore, was he. He couldn’t bear to call his former lover Vader, so he settled on Darth. It sounded ridiculous and would do just fine.

As he sat, he shivered a little, and the air around him changed. His unwelcome visitor decided to make an appearance, and he groaned. He didn’t have the energy for this. The absurdly large blue ghost appeared before him, taking up a massive amount of space, even in death. The wily bastard had a knowing smirk on his face.

“You seem to have relocated, Padawan.” He sat down on the chair by the bed and folded one long leg over the other like he was settling in for a while. Damn him.

“Blasted stars, Qui-Gon, what do you want from me? I’m doing something. Will that make you leave me alone?”

“Doing something? I don’t quite understand. Your role seems to be passive, young one.”

“I’ve been, how should I put this… unwell,” Obi-Wan said, pointing at the monitors and wires attached that seemed to have taken up residence on his sorry person.

Qui-Gon looked smug, as he often did. “So, you acknowledge that now?

“Yes, Qui-Gon, you were right. I made a mess of myself. Is that what you want to hear?”

“I’m glad that you can acknowledge that. You are going to aid this resistance?” It was more a statement than a question; rather like a Force suggestion.

Obi-Wan sighed. “I’m planning on it. What else would I do stuck out here with no credits and a rather unfortunately recognizable face.”

Qui-Gon stood up and stepped closer towards him, almost appearing menacing. His blue aura illuminated the room. “Planning on it? Trying are you? What would Master Yoda say?”

“Don’t quote that ridiculous green barve at me. I’ll help them once I recover.”

“Green barve? Where are your negotiating skills, anyway?”

“Lost with my dignity and charm, I suppose.”

Qui-Gon’s face softened and he sat back down. “I think you could still be charming, young one. I’ve never met a more incorrigible flirt. Sometimes I don’t even think you realize you’re doing it.”

“We all have our talents.” He was growing weary of this conversation and in general. He lay down on the bed with his arms behind his head.

“Obi-Wan, listen to me, and then I’ll leave. This is the right thing to do, but you have to commit to it, believe in it. It won’t work without the strength of your conviction and all of your skills. You cannot try.”

“Yes, Master,” he murmured, and the blue light faded. He hated it when Qui-Gon was right.

* * *

Back on the freighter, Rex was taking inventory of their supplies and making sure they were packed properly. He didn’t want things flying around and he didn’t want it to look like a bunch of shinies were running this operation. Artoo helped him while baby Luke babbled on in his bouncy chair and tried to make his toy tooka fly. Just a year ago, he could have never imagined this would be his life, minding babies and starting a rebellion. He and Cody would have laughed so hard they cried thinking about it.

Artoo stopped for a moment and burbled at him, leading him to the bridge. A light was flashing, indicating an incoming transmission. He doubted it was Ahsoka, so it had to be Cody or Senator Organa.

“Are you there?” said a gravelly male voice, Cody then.

“I’m here. Any developments?”

“Nothing new. Eclipse is away on his uh…boss’s orders. Are you ready to leave?” Their conversations were more awkward and stilted then they were before everything went to shit. Rex missed their easy banter.

“We’ll leave tomorrow.”

“Good. Take your time loading your… distinguished guest… onto the ship. Let the IG-86 droid get some pictures, but nothing too close. It’ll send them to me and it’ll follow you to the base. Destroy it when it gets there.”

“Roger that.”

“I’ll discuss the images with Eclipse and offer to investigate. It’ll all look very official. Anyway, he’s going to be tied up for some time on his current project. He’ll send me after you.”

“How do you know he won’t send the whole fleet out here after us and blast us all into space dust?”

“You’re going to have to trust me. I know him and so do you. His, well boss, doesn’t approve of his search for his former… friend…, and Eclipse is afraid of his employer. I don’t think Eclipse has any idea what he’ll do with the target when he gets him, but he doesn’t want to share, and he definitely doesn’t want the boss to know. I can talk him into sending me.”

“It’s going to be touchy.”

“The whole thing has been from the beginning. Why are you worried anyway? You’re the one who always rushes into things. I’m the cautious one.”

Rex smiled; he was glad to hear some of the old Cody, like things had never changed. “I see. Just like your General who never rushed into anything or did anything crazy.”

Cody’s voice seemed to drop. “It will be… I don’t know what to say to him.”

“He, he’s not the man you remember. He’s changed. But if there’s even a tiny bit of him left, he’ll forgive you. He didn’t hold grudges.”

“This is more than a grudge. I tried to kill him.”

“He’ll understand.” Rex tried to say that with certainty, but he didn’t know what Obi-Wan would say. Plus, he hadn’t even heard Obi-Wan speak yet, so there was that. Ahsoka hadn’t said much about his condition, other than it was bad, which wasn’t encouraging. They were all royally fucked, so maybe they had a chance in hell that this would work.

“And if he doesn’t?”

“He will. Anyway, he’s not a petty bastard. If he’s in on the plan he’ll work with you, even if he’s angry. Some Jedi mumbo jumbo.” He paused for a second, trying to get out the words he needed to say. He wasn’t any good at this kind of thing, but he’d try for Cody. “Anyway, I’ll be there for you, vod. No matter what, we’ll be in it together.”

He wished he could see Cody’s face, but he could almost hear him grinning. “All right you big softie.” He stopped to take an audible breath. “Thank you, vod. I’ll see you soon.”

* * *

Obi-Wan awoke to the sound of some commotion in the hallway outside his room. He could spy a cart loaded with supplies with the Twi’Lek healer nearby. Obi-Wan was curious to speak with her given the fact that she too was a Jedi exile. He’d seen her a few times, but not in the best or most flattering circumstances, circumstances that didn’t lend themselves to meaningful conversations.

She looked his way through the transparisteel window, and her eyes met his own. She gave him a half smile and set down the satchel she was carrying, then came into his room. He sat up as straight as he could and tried to flatten hair that wasn’t there. If there was anything he couldn’t forgive, it was the clipping of his hair. Well, they might as well get to know each other.

“Hello, friend. I suppose I have you to thank for my continued existence?”

She raised a brow ridge, but grinned while she was at it. “I’m not sure if that’s an insult or an expression of gratitude. I’m Nima, Nima Bril.”

“Please call me Obi-Wan. I don’t think that I’ve met you, at least before this… debacle. Were you raised at the Temple on Coruscant?”

She sat down in the chair Ahsoka usually occupied. “I was, though I’m a fair bit older than you. I was a crechemate of Master Che’s. Given the large and assorted collection of scars on your body, I’m assuming you were acquainted?”

He shuddered. “Too well.”

She smiled again, and this time it reached her clear eyes. She had a comforting presence; without knowing her it would have been obvious to any Force sensitive that she was a healer, and one who meant well.

“I must ask you something. My connection to the Force… it is not as it should be. I assume the physical weakness will pass, but this worries me.”

“I’ll be frank. You must have been using the Force to sustain yourself for some time? Ignoring the needs of your body? And during that time, you were poisoning yourself whether it was purposeful or not. The force is trying to protect you from abusing it further. It will take time and healing, but you will recover.”

He understood, though it was difficult to admit, that his troubles were self-induced, but how was he supposed to go on? Memories came back, unbidden, of the corpses of murdered children strewn about his feet like fallen leaves, of Anakin screaming at him about his new Empire, of the brief falling glimpse of Cody’s blank face after he shot him. Nima was looking on at him, her face filled with worry. He was sure his distress was bleeding through what was left of his shields.

He felt bereft and desperate and yearned for a drink. “Didn’t you feel it? Didn’t you? You must have.” He took a sobbing breath. “It was my fault. Mine. I loved him. I never told him. He didn’t trust me. My fault.”

She rested her hand on his forearm, sending soothing warmth throughout him. “I did feel it, but I don’t see how any of this is your fault. Ahsoka explained what happened to me. It’s only the Sith’s.”

“He was my apprentice and I loved him. I failed him. Together we could have ended this. Why didn’t he come to me?”

“I can’t answer that, but if this works, you’ll be able to ask him. He was an adult, a Jedi, a person capable of their own decisions and of understanding the consequences. I can empathize with your pain, though it is your own. You have to decide if you will let if consume you or not. That is your choice.”

He turned his head away from her and nodded slightly. “Ahsoka needs my help… And Luke.”

“Yes, they do. Let that be a distraction. And please, let others help you. You don’t have to bear this alone.”

He ran a shaky hand across his face, wondering if this emotional lability would pass as well. “I apologize, I’m usually more in control than this.”

“Maybe that’s the problem? Anyway, we are leaving tomorrow. It’s far earlier than I had wanted you to leave. Ahsoka means well, but she’ll push you, and it’s too soon.”

He could feel the pervasive exhaustion, the heaviness throughout his body. His limbs felt like lead weights. “She is energetic. Where are we going again? Some base? I’m sure its somewhere quite charming and hospitable.”

She laughed a little. “Some remote, barely populated planet called Saijo.”

“Ah yes, I remember now. I’d pack my bags, but I’m fairly certain I don’t have any. Is this what I’ll be wearing for the rest of my days?” He grinned and pointed at the hospital gown. “It isn’t the most flattering attire.”

“We’ll have to find you some clothes. We’re going to bring you out to the ship in the morning, but you must rest. I won’t let anyone push you too hard. Not yet. You’ll never recover if you don’t rest.”

“I have a feeling you’ll be worse than Master Che.”

She stood up to leave, still laughing a little. “I should hope so. You’ll have to tell me stories about her.”

She was both a connection to his new life and the old, and truthfully, he was glad for her presence. “Thank you,” he called to her as she left the room. She turned and smiled on her way out.

* * *

The med center had a small landing platform that was at least large enough to allow their freighter to land and would allow for them to make enough of a scene for the droid to notice. Ahsoka was aware of her subset of skills, and making a scene was one of them. Her Masters had taught her well.

They’d make a slow production of loading some medical equipment onto the freighter, and then bring in Obi-Wan. Rex had scouted out the droid’s hiding place behind a rock pillar. The angle wouldn’t allow it to get a good image of Obi-Wan, thankfully. They wanted to make a scene, but not that big of a scene.

Rex would spy on the droid from his own hiding place with electrobinoculars. Once he saw that it was watching, he would send Ahsoka the signal. As they hauled cargo onto the ship, Ahsoka kept looking up at the sky expecting a star destroyer to materialize out of nowhere above their heads.

Now, she had one more difficult task; getting Obi-Wan to agree to lay on a stretcher and be hovered out. He’d stood up a few wobbly times since he’d arrived, but she doubted he could handle the walk, not that he’d ever admit it. She’d honestly feel better if he put up a fight and showed a little bit of his old stubborn self.

It went as well as expected. “There’s no need for me to lay on that thing. Ahsoka, at least let me sit up and retain some dignity.”

Ahsoka crossed her arms over her chest and gave him her best glare. “The droid’ll get too good of a view of your face if you’re upright. Who’s going to see you anyway? Me, Rex, the doctor? Trust me, we’ve all seen you a lot worse.”

Obi-Wan grimaced. At least he was wearing a loose tunic and trousers they’d dredged up for him. He reluctantly agreed to shave again so that he’d be less recognizable. “The Force will witness it.” He shook his head and grinned. “It seems you’re dead set on humiliating me. I suppose the less of a fuss I make the less sick pleasure you’ll derive from it.”

Ahsoka grinned back. “If that makes you feel better.”

Few and far between, these glimpses of his old self were encouraging. A few minutes earlier, Ahsoka’s com had pinged with Rex’s signal that everything was in order. With that, Obi-Wan reluctantly was helped onto the hover stretcher and loaded onto the freighter like a valuable piece of merchandise. After everyone was settled, they were off. No star destroyers materialized, thankfully.

There were two crew cabins on the freighter, and they’d put Obi-Wan with the doctor in one, instead of the tiny medbay. Back at the bridge, Ahsoka and Rex worked on flight coordinates. Luke sat in his bouncy chair beside them and was chewing thoughtfully on a block.

Thinking about the endgame of the plan was overwhelming, so Ahsoka had been breaking off each task into manageable bites. She’d succeeded in obtaining Obi-Wan, so now she needed to get them to Saijo. If they made it there safely, she’d feel like a weight was lifted from her.

“I have to say, Tano, I’m glad that you’re back on the ship where I can keep an eye on you,” Rex said, turning towards her and grinning.

Ahsoka just shook her head, rolling her eyes. With the help of Artoo, they plotted out a meandering route to Saijo. It was quite some ways off the Corellian Trade Route and it took some careful calculations.

Once they were in route, Luke started to whimper. He’d been fed and changed recently, so that wasn’t it. Rex got up and went over to him, picking him up.

“What is it little man? What do you want?”

Luke looked at him pensively and then at the door leading to the rest of the ship.

“EEEeeeeeee,” he said softly, shaking a pudgy fist.

“I’ll take him,” Ahsoka said. She had an idea of what he wanted.

Ahsoka took Luke in her arms and he immediately put one of her lekku in his mouth. She gently removed it and put it behind her shoulder. Giggling a little, she walked back to Obi-Wan’s cabin and knocked on the door.

Nima opened it and grinned at Luke. He had no interest in her, because the object of his affection was laying on the bed.

“BEEEEEEEee!?!” he yelled, trying to wiggle away from Ahsoka, reaching both arms towards Obi-Wan.

He stirred where he was sleeping and sat up. Recognizing Luke, a strange looked crossed his face. It wasn’t the usual look people make when they see a baby, but the look of a man bereft. It passed quickly and was replaced by a soft smile. He gestured to Ahsoka to hand him Luke.

Obi-Wan took him in his arms and held him against his chest. Luke wiggled with excitement at first, babbling, but then relaxed against him, closing his eyes. Obi-Wan rubbed his back gently and his small head, breathing in the baby smell of his hair.

“He knows you,” Ahsoka said.

“I suppose he does,” Obi-Wan said softly, almost with remorse.

“This is why we’re doing this. This is what we need to protect.” Ahsoka said firmly, pointing at Luke. “The galaxy is full of innocent things like him. We have to try.”

He went white as a sheet, looking pinched around the mouth, and shut his eyes. “I will.”

“That’s enough for now,” Nima advised, not leaving room for commentary. “I’ll bring the youngling back when he wakes up.” She unceremoniously ushered Ahsoka out the door.

A day passed uneventfully, and they approached Saijo. It was a largely uncharted, temperate, outer rim planet of massive forests and deep rivers leading to two massive oceans. There was one unsophisticated settlement, with little space travel other than infrequent trade and primitive communications. There were no valuable resources here, other than natural beauty. It had never come to the notice of the greater galaxy and seemed to be the perfect site for a Rebel base.

Ahsoka knew that the base itself was still in the construction phase, inhabited by a few workers and droids. The living quarters and the medbay were finished, and one hanger was available. The rest was still in process. It was surrounded by massive trees with thick green canopy, tall enough to hide a freighter.

As they landed, she could feel that the whole place thrummed with the Living Force; tree tops swaying in the wind, birds calling. She felt like she was coming home, or as close as it would get for now. They had made it.

* * *

Cody remained on Vader’s flagship, awaiting the transmissions. New images arrived which though not perfectly clear, were moderately convincing. He did what he must and shared them with Vader. Cody laughed to himself darkly when he thought back to how cautious he used to be, how careful. Funny how things changed when there was nothing left to lose.

Vader replied via their encrypted communication channel. “I find these images intriguing. However, the Emperor will not allow me to leave now while the siege remains. Despite his earlier promises to let me keep my old Master, he has told me that this search is now forbidden.”

Cody shuddered at the idea of Vader keeping Obi-Wan as some kind of pet and tried not to imagine what he would do to him if they failed. Cody took a deep breath. At lease things were proceeding according to plan so far. “I will go, my lord. Allow me to investigate further. If the lead proves true, we will make arrangements.”

“That would be satisfactory.”

“The group that kidnapped him has left Polis Massa, but the tracker remains on the ship. As soon as I receive the coordinates, I will head there myself.”

“You will not fail me, Cody.”

Oh, but I will, Cody thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My work schedule's been a bit crazy, so I hope this is all right c:
> 
> Thank you so much to everyone who's read, commented, or left kudos. I really appreciate it! 
> 
> If you'd like, let me know what you think!
> 
> A big thanks to my ever patient and wonderful beta picavenger14!
> 
> darthplodder on Tumblr. Ok.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're getting closer to the actual obikin; eventually these two will actually interact in real time XD
> 
> Some reunions with old friends
> 
> I hope you enjoy it!!

The first few days on the Saijo base were calm and uneventful. They settled everyone in, unpacked, got to know the place. It was still clean and sterile, unsullied and without scuffs, its straight lines and white walls out of place with the dense surrounding forest and the earthy smell of wet dirt. Vines had been planted along the walls to provide camouflage, but they hadn’t yet grown. Bird call, distant and lyrical, was ever present.

Senator Organa had them well stocked with food, weapons, and medical supplies. There was a small group of Rebels directing the completion of the base and involved in its maintenance. Senator Organa had actually sent a young Alderanian woman to serve as a nanny for Luke. She was all quiet smiles and braided dark hair, and Luke had loved her immediately. Rex was almost sad to give up his babysitting duties, but there were more urgent issues.

He made his way to the communication room one morning, a few days after their arrival to check in with Cody.

“Where are you? Did you leave yet?” Rex asked, once he hailed Cody on their encrypted frequency.

“Yeah, he let me go. I’m currently on Orondia, getting a new ship.”

Rex let out a sigh of relief that things were going according to plan. “Orondia, huh? The other side of the galaxy.”

“Trying to hide my tracks and get rid of the ship I left on. I didn’t want to just waltz in with Vader’s personal Nubian skiff, which is a bit _distinctive_. I dumped it and bought a new ship, and by new, I mean old. This little freighter is the most beat up piece of shit you can imagine, but I got her fitted with a new hyperdrive. No one will notice me.”

“Pity, you were never very good at putting on a show. When will you get here?”

Cody snorted. “Seven days or something like that. She’s faster than she looks, but I’m not going to take the direct route. Discourage any followers.”

“You’re in luck cause there’s really no direct route anyway. Practically wild kriffing space.”

“Sounds charming. Rex, how is he?”

There really could only be one he Cody would refer to. “Your general? Seems to be getting better. Doesn’t talk all that much.”

“That’s not exactly reassuring knowing him. He’s either plotting or stewing.”

“Maybe both?”

“Probably both. He knows I’m coming?”

Not exactly, thought Rex. He knew that he had been avoiding General Kenobi. It was hard to face his obvious grief and honestly, Rex had no idea what to say to him. He’d have to get over it though. They all needed to have a big talk about the next step in their plan, and he hoped to do that later that day. “Of course. Don’t worry about it.”

After he’d spoken with Cody, he went to find Ahsoka. She was doing some kind of acrobatic Jedi training in an empty store room.

“Tano, we need to get the doctor and the General and have a little talk. Cody will be here in a week and Vader will expect answers right away. We’ll need to plan.”

“Cody’s on his way?”

“Yup, Vader let him go.”

Ahsoka let out the same sigh Rex had earlier. “That’s a relief.”

Ahsoka clipped her saber and shoto to her belt and they went to find the others. Obi-Wan was notably not in his room, hopefully with the Doctor. They found Nima unpacking the medbay and arranging the supplies and equipment with the help of several droids. She looked up from her inventory when Rex and Ahsoka came in.

“Hello Ahsoka, Rex. Did you need something?” She asked, setting down her datapad.

“Yah, we need to talk with you and the General. Where is he?”

“I don’t exactly know,” she said, continuing to review her available medications.

“You don’t know? Aren’t you supposed to be caring for him?” Ahsoka asked, arms folded across her chest.

She raised a brow ridge, giving Ahsoka a pointed look. “He’s a Jedi Master, not a child and is getting stronger by the day. It’s not as if I can sit on him and hold him down. Anyway, he was here an hour ago. I can’t imagine he’s gotten into that much trouble yet.”

“You don’t understand, he’s really good at trouble.”

“So I’ve heard. I’m a little afraid to see what he’s capable of. It’s time for midday meal, isn’t it? We could all meet in the cafeteria.”

“Yeah, I’ll go find Obi-Wan and bring him there,” Ahsoka offered.

Rex nodded back. “Com us if you run into trouble or if he’s being a stubborn ass.”

* * *

Obi-Wan was tired of being the invalid, which was making him feel contrary. No one gave him anything to do, so in retribution he snuck away like a scolded tooka. The staff at the base had pulled a few chairs outside to sit and had made a little firepit, and it would be a good place to enjoy some Corellian brandy. Damn you, he thought, that’s what got you into this mess in the first place. The urge to find oblivion was oh so strong. He really needed something to do.

The back of the base bordered on the dense forest, and Obi-Wan sat there, slumped in his chair. He’d tried to meditate, but his mind wouldn’t quiet. The air was fresh and damp. Rain would come soon, as it did every afternoon. Birds swooped around him, mocking him with their levity and freedom.

The sun was warm though, and he grew drowsy. The birds decided to leave him alone. His mind wandered to places he wished to ignore, but before he knew it, he was back on Mustafar with his hopes and dreams burning into ash. What should he have done? What could he have done? At that point it had been too late. There’d been no changing Anakin’s mind then, so who’s to say he could change it know?

It was too late then. It was probably too late now. He should have told him so many things long before they got to that point. Mainly, that Obi-Wan loved him. That he loved him and that he would help him with whatever he needed. That his love was unconditional. That he would take Anakin and run as far as he could and keep him and Padme and the children safe.

Obi-Wan remembered another time; the weight of Anakin straddling his lap, pushing him into a bed and closer to the earth. The feel of his firm back and muscles sliding under silken skin. The quiet sound of a whisper hot in his ear with soft hair brushing against his face. He remembered Anakin crawling into bed with him, just to sleep beside him and feel his warmth. Half the time Obi-Wan had turned him away, dealing with his own demons. That was a solid regret.

He’d had so many opportunities. He should have asked Anakin was what wrong. Forced him to tell him, but the words had always lodged themselves tight in this throat. As quickly as it came, this reverie was disturbed by the sound of footsteps on the loose dirt, his Force sense still muddy and muddled by his recent illness.

“Master! There you are! We’ve been looking for you,” Ahsoka said, walking over towards his chair.

She held out her hands and pulled him to standing, then unexpectedly pulled him into a tight hug. She’d grown so much in the last two years, Obi-Wan thought. Now she was taller than him and felt strong and solid.

“What was that for?” Obi-Wan asked, smiling at her.

“You look better! I just want you to get well.”

He felt a rare sense of warmth run through him. “Thank you for your concern, little one. I am working on it. I think you’ll find that I’m hard to get rid of.”

“No one wants to get rid of you, Master! Anyway, we need to start making some plans. Will you come with me to the cafeteria? Rex and Nima are waiting for us.”

“Lead the way. I wouldn’t want to delay anything.”

They joined the others at one of the tables in the empty cafeteria. Rex and the doctor sat with meal packs and caf in front of them, with a setting out for Ahsoka. In front of his spot, there was a bowl of plain nutritional porridge and a cup of tea. Ah, the life of an invalid.

“When do I graduate from this?” he asked, pointing to the bowl of hateful stuff.

“When you eat it all without vomiting,” Nima replied.

He felt his face grow hot with incipient shame and guilt at the mess he’d made of things. Sometimes he thought that none of this was real, that he’d open his eyes and wake up back at the Temple with his friends around him and not on a remote outer rim planet, an exile of everything he held dear. At least the tea was sweetened a little and fairly strong.

He looked around the table where Rex was staring intently at the remnant of his nerf steak, Ahsoka was stirring some questionable legumes around, and the doctor was just giving him an encouraging smile. All in all, it was awkward. He wondered what they thought of him, that he was once a hero, now a washed up old drunk who couldn’t keep down porridge. He’d lost himself so quickly he hadn’t even noticed.

“Well, what’s the plan?” He asked, trying to break the silence and avoid the contents of his treacherous mind.

Rex looked a little relieved. “Cody will be here in about a week and will finalize things then but…”

“Cody? No one said anything about Cody. Where is he?” He felt an aching sense of loss thinking about his old comrade in arms, his reliable, pragmatic bulwark. He still couldn’t understand what had gone wrong.

“Um, well, he’s on his way here now. He’s been with Vader since things went to shit. You know, don’t you, about the chips?”

“Chips?” He didn’t want to think about poor Cody, caught within the Empire.

“The inhibitor chips. Inside the clones’ heads? Rex here had his removed. They probably took some brains with it,” Ashoka said, poking Rex in the temple.

“I don’t know of any chips. All I know is one minute Cody was handing me my lightsaber and the next he was shooting to kill. Please enlighten me.”

“Palpatine had these organic chips put in the clones’ brains that allowed him control over them when he wanted. He made them all turn on their Jedi at once, including Cody. He couldn’t override it.”

Rex frowned. “Cody was wrecked by it. He’s watched over Vader for you since.”

“For me?”

“He thought that’s what you’d want.”

Obi-Wan set down his spoon in the half-eaten gruel and got up from the table. His emotional control was gone, the grief running through him in unrelenting waves. He walked over to the window, feeling the hot prick of tears and shame behind his eyes. Taking a few sobbing breaths, he leaned against the window, all his regained strength fading.

He could feel someone come up behind him and a small hand on his back. “We don’t have to discuss this now. Do you want to go?” The doctor, then.

“What did we do to deserve this? We tried so hard. We only wanted to do what was right.”

“I cannot think to understand the ways of the Force, but I know for certain that no clone deserved this, especially not your Cody. And I doubt you, or Ahsoka deserved this. There’s nothing that can change the fact that it happened. We have to move on.”

“And kill the Sith.”

“That may help,” she said, smiling. She put her arm around his back and helped him back to standing.

“Well, perhaps we should get back to planning?”

Action was always a good thing. “That would be best.”

They walked back over to the table where Rex and Ahsoka were watching them warily. Obi-Wan took a deep breath. “Well then. Where were we?”

“Cody will get here in about a week. He’s working for Vader, who’s looking for you,” Ahsoka said.

“Looking for me? This all sounds very convoluted.”

“I guess, but how long could he last without you? Probably not long. Anyway, Vader thinks Cody is out following a lead looking for you. Vader sent an assassin droid out to find you. But not assassinate you,” Ahsoka said.

“This is all very logical.”

Ahsoka rolled her eyes. “Just listen, Master! Anyway, the droid sent pictures of you to Cody and Vader, and Vader sent Cody out to find you and report back.”

“So Vader’s going to be expecting an answer soon and Cody will give it once we’re ready. And once Vader knows it’s you, he’ll be hightailing it here. Then we’ll catch him,” Rex said, determined.

“Intriguing. Or maybe he’ll send his Imperial cronies out to end us?”

“Cody doesn’t think so. Vader’s been keeping this secret from the Emperor. He doesn’t want him to know. Cody’s sure he’ll come out here by himself,” Rex replied.

“All right, saying we do catch him and somehow can contain him, how exactly are we going to convince him to kill the Emperor? That’s where I come in, right?”

Ahsoka looked at him encouragingly. “You’re going to show him you still love him.”

This was all quite a lot to take in. “How will I do that? He hates me.”

“Maybe, but he’s still obsessed with you. Cody says he thinks about you constantly,” Rex remarked.

Ahsoka looked away for a minute, averting her eyes, clearly embarrassed. “I’m sorry Master but I have to say it. He loved you; just seduce him or something.”

Obi-Wan blinked incredulously. He knew Ahsoka had some kind of plan like this, but dear Force how ridiculous it sounded out loud. Given that fact, it just may work.

“I see. Is there a spa around here? I hardly doubt I’m looking my best if it’s seduction you had in mind,” Obi-Wan said archly.

Ahsoka grinned. “Well, you have a week or so to get on that.”

“I guess I have some hard work ahead. Where exactly are we going to keep our prisoner?”

“The base has detention units. One is both a medical and detention cell; we’ll keep him there. It’s all ready,” Rex said.

“Before this all started, Rex and I got our hands on a Force inhibitor collar,” Ahsoka advised.

“You can’t keep that on him indefinitely,” Nima said. “It’ll make him ill. Rex, didn’t Cody tell you he didn’t think Vader was healed properly?”

“Yeah, he said something about that. He said that’s partly why he wears the suit.”

Nima looked at him thoughtfully. “If I can help him to heal properly, it may be a way we can convince him to help us.”

This was a good plan, Obi-Wan thought, the most logically he’d heard so far. “Yes, I agree. We can hardly go on my good looks alone.”

Rex snorted and Ahsoka giggled. At least the mood had lightened up a little. “What more do we need to do?”

“We’re still working on building up the defenses of this base and Ahsoka and I have to go track down the assassin droid and destroy it before someone else gets their hands on it.”

“You better focus on getting better. You’ll have a lot of work to do.”

“I suppose I will,” Obi-Wan said, and forced himself to finish the cold porridge.

As he left the cafeteria, he came upon a pretty young woman, head wrapped in brown braids, holding a very squirmy bundle.

“Bi! BEEEEEEEEEEeeeee!!!” the bundle shouted, as he increased his attempts at escape.

“I’m sorry sir, he’s usually a good baby, but it seems like every time you’re even remotely close by he starts calling for you.”

In the Force, Luke was like sunlight reflecting off blue water or fresh flowers, something pure and light, and he was strong. He’d be formidable as an adult. “It’s no bother. He’s a sweet little soul.”

Obi-Wan took Luke from her, and he crowed with pleasure and slapped his pudgy little hands on Obi-Wan’s face. He ruffled Luke’s candy floss hair and couldn’t help but smile.

Now that Luke had found the objection of his affection, he settled heavy against Obi-Wan, eyes a little droopy.

“Is it his bedtime?”

“It is,” the girl replied, rubbing her hands on her Alderaanian work dress.

“I’ll help you settle him in.”

Obi-Wan carried a now peaceful, drowsing Luke to his bedroom, adjacent to the girl’s. Holding him to his chest, he rocked Luke a little, then laid him in his crib. _I’ll protect you_ , he thought. There was still a tiny spark of hope left in him and still hope for the galaxy.

* * *

Cody finally made his approach towards Saijo. It was blue-green without any large visible settlements or industry, at least from the clouds. He felt nauseated and restless, anxiety burning a hole in his stomach, skin clammy. Rex had given Cody coordinates that avoided flying over the one settlement on Saijo; the less they were noticed the better. He tried to focus on landing, not on what was to come.

Rex had told him to land on the cleared-out field next to the base, and he did so, as the large, orange sun was beginning to set. Once the larger hanger was built, they’d move his ship, but for now it would be open to the sky.

After he landed, he found Rex and Ahsoka waiting for him by the newly built base. Rex had been working on assembling a rocket launcher, along with inspecting some other blaster cannons, but he stopped what he was doing, ran to Cody, and clasped his forearms and grinned. Ahsoka followed behind and nearly suffocated him with a startling hug. A small sense of relief washed through him, though someone was clearly absent.

“Where’s the General?”

“Resting. He didn’t want to overwhelm you on your arrival, but he asked us to bring you to him whenever you were ready.”

“I’m ready. I just need to get it over with.” He’d never been one to run from danger, but he felt the blood leaving his face and getting ready to pool in his legs.

“He doesn’t hate you, Cody. It’s going to be ok.”

“I’m going to have to see for myself. Take me there?”

“We will… but you look terrible, vod. Haven’t you been taking care of yourself?”

He’d had no appetite the last few months and sleep was non-existent. Cody rubbed at his aching head. “Not really.”

There wasn’t more to say about it than that. How were any of them doing well? He’d been forced to betray the people he loved. He’d found out that he’d been created only for that betrayal. How does anyone get over that?

“I’ll be fine once I have a mission again. A distraction. Something to blast would be good.”

“Too bad we already blasted that stinking droid. Come on Cody, we’ll take you to him.”

“Pity. Would have liked turning that thing into space dust,” Cody said as he followed them into the base and down a few hallways into the living quarters. They approached a door and it opened on its own. Ahsoka gave him a push inside.

Sitting on the bed was a man that he knew but didn’t. The man stood up and walked towards him. He could hear the sound of the blood rushing through his ears like a great wind rolling down a plain.

Cody’s legs, once strong, seemed to no longer be able to hold him up. He found himself sinking to his knees in front of his general, involuntarily shaking. Bitter bile filled his throat. He felt his eyes close tight with remorse. “I’m sorry. I didn’t…”

Words left him, his throat finally closing off in grief. He’d imagined this moment so many times. It was nothing like he thought. When he opened his eyes, his General was sitting down beside him on the floor, taking Cody’s hands in his own.

If it wasn’t for the expression on his face, Cody would have thought they sent him to the wrong room. His General looked as bad as Cody felt. He looked like grief had burned through him like a wildfire, consuming everything in its path and leaving nothing but the scaffolding. There was a hint of his old spark in his eyes though.

“I… I never thought I’d see you again. Cody… dear friend…” Obi-Wan’s face was soft, gentle. There was no anger there. “You don’t need to be sorry. I saw your face. Just for a brief second.”

Obi-Wan pulled Cody into his arms and held him there for a moment as Cody continued to tremble and choke back on tears. He’d never been taught how to manage this emotion. His General felt as brittle as a pile of dry kindling, yet still very strong. Speech remained lost to him.

Obi-Wan released him and pushed away a little, hands still on Cody’s shoulders. “As I fell, I saw your face. It wasn’t you who gave those orders… Plus, you can’t have though that I’d be so easy to kill.” This got Cody a wink and a tiny grin.

“Never,” Cody said, leaning his forehead against his General’s chest. Obi-Wan was infuriating and frustrating and sometimes impossible to work with, but damn Cody had missed him, missed him as much as Rex, missed him like a part of him was gone.

He’d never been demonstrative, and the emotions of the evening were overwhelming. He pushed himself away gently and grinned. “I happened to see that Rex gets a very big gun.”

This won him a wide, toothy smile, and it almost felt like old times. “Well, I suppose you can have a very big gun too.”

“Wouldn’t work any other way.”

His General studied his face and lightly touched his cheek. “You don’t look well.”

Cody knew he didn’t, knew that he looked like a sleepless wraith and that his uniform no longer fit him, but it was a little absurd coming from Obi-Wan. “I’m going to pretend that you of all people didn’t say that. But it has been a rough few months. I’m sure you understand.”

“All too well, dear friend. You’ll have to tell me about him. When you’re ready.” A dark, forlorn look crossed his face, but then it settled back into its usual lines.

There was no doubt of who ‘him’ could be. “Of course. Maybe not right now. I’m tired.”

His general gave him a fond, sad look, and pulled him up to standing, putting his arm around Cody’s shoulders. “Let’s have some dinner and get some rest for the night, hmm? You need to get some strength back too. Tomorrow we’ll plan.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, Vader/Anakin will be in the next chapter, woohoo!!!
> 
> Thank you for reading!! If you'd like, let me know what you think.
> 
> A big thanks to anyone who left kudos or comments; it makes my day :D
> 
> My friend and beta picavenger14 is the actual best. Any nonsense is my own.


	7. Chapter 7

Cody woke up gasping in the dark, covered in sweat, completely disoriented. The familiar hum of starship life was gone; there was nothing but silence and lightless void and cool air. He fumbled for the light pad, trying to remember what had woken him up. It didn’t matter, sleep was futile. He set the lights on dim and leaned back against the wall. He couldn’t take much of this anymore.

Cody was startled out of dark thoughts by a knock at his door. Looking at his chrono, it was the very early morning so he doubted it was Rex, who secretly hated mornings. Cody opened it, and in walked his General. The dim light accented the hollows of his face, making him look more like a gaunt specter than the man he knew. He sat down heavily on the little chair by the tiny desk, the only furniture other than his cot. The room was still bigger than the pods they had slept in on Kamino.

Obi-Wan’s voice was soft and a little hoarse, like it was out of practice. “I could feel your distress, friend.”

“I hope I didn’t disturb your sleep. It’s just a nightmare,” Cody said, sheepishly.

“I’m no stranger to nightmares. Tell me about it?”

“I don’t remember any details. Just stress, I guess.” Cody was acutely aware that he wasn’t wearing anything but his shorts, and wrapped the sheet tightly around his waist, twisting it in his hands until his knuckles turned white.

“Well, there’s been no shortage of that, my friend.” Obi-Wan stood up, likely noticing his discomfort. “Do you want to meet me in the mess hall for tea?”

Anything was better than sitting alone in the dark, stewing on the past. “Sure.”

“Get dressed. I’ll be waiting,” he said with a small smile, one of the few genuine ones Cody had seen. It wasn’t his usual sly grin, all teeth, but it was good none the less.

Once he was dressed, Cody found Obi-Wan alone in the mess hall. The faintest dawn light was seeping through the small, high windows, alighting on his hair. He passed Cody a mug of tea, and it was milky and slightly thick, like someone had put nutrient powder in it. He looked over and saw that his General’s looked the same. It wasn’t exactly unpleasant.

“It’s very sweet,” was all he could say.

“The sugar will do you some good. I find it very calming,” Obi-Wan said, hands wrapped around his mug as he took a sip.

That explains a lot, thought Cody. The man probably found stims calming.

“I’m sorry Cody,” Obi-Wan said, peering out the windows.

This man and his misplaced guilt. “Why are you sorry? Nothing was your fault.”

“Perhaps not. Perhaps none of this was our faults. But it doesn’t make me less sorry.” Obi-Wan looked back at Cody and rubbed at his stubbled chin thoughtfully. “Anakin’s fall was largely my fault.”

“How so?”

Obi-Wan set his mug down and looked at him thoughtfully. “I didn’t know what he needed when he came to me. I was too young, grieving my old Master, without much empathy towards a child I felt wronged me. It wasn’t entirely rational.”

He leaned back in his chair, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I didn’t… I didn’t take the time to understand where he came from. I tried to teach him like one would any other Padawan, and that wasn’t what he needed.”

Obi-Wan took a ragged breath, almost like a sob. “He didn’t trust me. Not in the end. And I, my care, my love, wasn’t enough. It was too little, too late,” he said, looking back out the window like he was afraid to meet Cody’s eyes. “It’s easy to see it now, why couldn’t I have seen it then?”

“Maybe you were distracted by other things? Like a war? You’re not perfect, even though you sometimes think you are, but I understand the guilt.”

Now there was a hint of that sly smile. “I never claimed to be perfect, Cody.”

“You can’t deny that’s what you expect of yourself.”

“Perhaps.” Obi-Wan said, lightly squeezing his arm. His face darkened again, lost in thought. “What… what was he like, after…”

“Lonely, lost. Sometimes it showed up as rage, but sometimes he was just blank, empty, you know? He’d realized he’d lost everything he’d wanted, his Senator, his friends, you, and has no way out, stuck with a monster.”

“You sound very wise, Cody.” Obi-Wan was smirking now, but his in his eyes Cody could see it was genuine.

“I’ve had a lot of time to think. He wants someone to care about him, to lead him. He lets the Emperor order him around because it’s something and that’s better than nothing at all.”

Obi-Wan took a thoughtful sip of his tea. “I haven’t told Ahsoka, Cody, but I don’t know if I can do this. I still love him but cannot condone his actions.”

“I understand, sir, but it’s probably too late to back out”

Obi-Wan smiled at him again, but it didn’t reach his eyes. They were just sad and lost. “Please Cody, for the love of all that is good, call me by my name or call me Ben or call me anything other than sir or general. Please.”

“It’s a hard habit to break, but I’ll try.”

“I accept that.” Obi-Wan yawned and shook out his shoulders a little. “How can I forgive him, Cody? He slaughtered children, my friends, so many innocent lives. He ended my life as I know it.”

“I can’t answer that, my friend. I can’t wrap my head around that myself. We need him though, don’t we? If this is to end? Do you think we could kill the Emperor without him?”

Obi-Wan raised his brows. “No. Ahsoka is right, we do need him.”

“Anyway, it’s not just on you to turn him back. Despite how good you think you are, this is too much for one person. No reckless self-sacrifice this time.”

Obi-Wan smiled genuinely and gave Cody’s shoulder a gentle punch. “No guarantees on that front; you know me too well, old friend. I guess we’ll work it out together, right?”

“Yup. You have lots of help.”

“And Cody, this is a totally self-indulgent question, but he still thinks about me?”

Cody chuckled. “All the time, but I’d be lying if I said they were always nice thoughts. Hells, man, he’s on a secret mission to find you. I’d say he’s kind of obsessed.”

Obi-Wan grimaced. “Honestly, that’s rather terrifying.”

“What’s terrifying? This bantha rodeo we roped ourselves into?” asked a voice from the door. It was Rex, coming in to join them, with Ahsoka behind him, snickering. R2 was rolling in with her, and he burbled a greeting.

“Did we interrupt something?” Ahsoka asked.

“Nothing important,” Obi-Wan said with his most charming smile.

Cody groaned. “Welcome to the tea party. Have a seat,” he said, pulling out some chairs. There’d been enough talk and they really needed to get to it. Plus his emotions were shot to hell, and he needed a break.

“Vader will soon figure out that the droid is demolished, and he’ll be expecting to hear from me. I need to com him later today, so we need a plan,” Cody said, to the assembled group. Ahsoka and Rex had sat down beside them in the offered chairs.

“We needed a plan yesterday,” Ahsoka said, rolling her eyes.

“What, aren’t you in charge?” Rex asked, smacking her in the shoulder. She stuck her tongue at him in retaliation.

Obi-Wan took a theatrically deep breath. “My very young friends. Do you realize that you have to both capture him and keep him?”

“We have the Force inhibitor collar,” Rex said.

“That’s all well and good, but you have to get it on him,” Obi-Wan replied.

Anakin fought like a wounded reek when cornered, and it was going to be worse with his new Sith powers. He’d be stronger than he’d been in the Clone Wars and more desperate. It was terrifying when you thought about it.

“You can’t rely on me to capture him if that was your plan. I doubt that I have the strength to subdue him anymore,” Obi-Wan said, studying the patterns in the plastisteel of the table.

“What about us together, Master? We’ll be very strong,” Ahsoka asked.

“You have grown so much, young one, but even together I’m not sure we can. His anger will make him very powerful.”

Rex turned to Ahsoka. “What about my idea?”

Ahsoka grimaced. “Rex, no. We talked about that. We could hurt him.”

“Fuck that. He can stand to be hurt. Look at what he did.”

Rex clearly had not forgiven Anakin, but that was frankly understandable. They too had been close as brothers until he’d turned. “What was your plan, Rex?” Obi-Wan asked.

Ahsoka crossed her arms around her chest and glowered.

Rex ignored her. “We give him coordinates over a point of our choosing out in the woods and blow him out of the sky.”

“And then?” Obi-Wan asked, brow raised in expectation.

“Alone in the woods, he’ll be vulnerable, out of his element, in rough terrain. We’ll come upon him in the trees, each carrying a hypospray of sedative.”

R2 started to beep excitedly, bouncing on his struts. “What is it, little guy?” Ahsoka asked, turning towards the droid. He let out a series of beeps and trills while Ahsoka thoughtfully listened.

Ahsoka turned back to the group and grinned. “R2 thinks he could do it.”

“The droid?” Obi-Wan asked, taken aback.

Ahsoka was getting excited, her voice raising in pitch just a little. “Yes, the droid. He’d be shocked to find R2 out in the woods. R2 thinks he could get close and them shoot him with a dart of sedative or at least distract him enough so that we could.”

Cody asked the obvious question. “How are we going to get R2 and a gun big enough to take down a ship out into the woods?”

Rex continued on, determined. “We just have to disable the ship, not destroy it. There’s some tall rocks we could put the gun on. We could carry it with the freighter and lower it down if need be and bring R2 along on a speeder.”

“Sure, but then what? We can’t predict exactly where he’ll land,” Cody asked.

“Nope, but one of us can monitor from the treetops and let the rest of us know the coordinates. We’ll be waiting in speeders,” Rex said.

Obi-Wan shrugged, nodding a little. “It’s ridiculous, but ridiculous enough that it might just work. I think we should avoid him flying over the base or the settlement nearby. We don’t want anything recorded or images transmitted back to the Empire.”

Rex agreed. “Most of the planet is just uninhabited forest, so we’ll just have to pick the right coordinates.”

“He’ll not want the Emperor to know of his, um, mission, so I’m sure he won’t bring an imperial ship. He doesn’t want to share you with the Emperor,” Cody added.

“How charming. I’m certain that I don’t want to be shared with the Emperor as well,” Obi-Wan said, looking disgusted.

“Well, let’s choose our coordinates, shall we?” Ahsoka suggested. R2 projected a topographic map of the surrounding areas and they chose one that worked.

A few hours later, Cody went to the communications room to contact Vader. His heart was pounding in his chest, hands trembling. He couldn’t fail now; Vader had to believe him. Cody sat down at one of the consoles and dialed in their encrypted frequency, and a blue Vader appeared, small yet menacing.

“My Lord, I hope that I haven’t disturbed you.”

“No, Cody. I’ve been growing impatient waiting for your response. I expect that you have news?” It was funny how Vader was studying and changing his speech patterns, to sound as far from Anakin Skywalker as possible. Maybe funny wasn’t the right word. They had so little time before he turned completely into something else.

“I do. I’ve found him. Alive and well enough.”

There was a long pause punctuated only by the sound of mechanical breathing. “I see. Who has him?”

“He was abducted by a bunch of ruffians intent on selling him to the highest bidder. They’ve kept him pretty much drugged the whole time,” Cody said, hoping this would explain why someone as cunning as Obi-Wan wouldn’t have escaped.

“I, I want to see him.”

Thankfully, Cody was prepared, and they’d taken some stills of Obi-Wan laying in one of the berths on the freighter, appearing unconscious and cuffed, entirely vulnerable. They looked convincing, and Obi-Wan looked to be one step above a corpse.

Obi-Wan didn’t look great to begin with and then he’d spent an hour convincing Ahsoka to punch him in the side of the face to make it look believable. She’d refused, but Rex had carried through with it, a little too gleefully. They’d smiled about it after, at least.

“They are treating him poorly and deserve punishment!” this came a shout, followed by a loud banging. “What have they done to his hair?” It was likely something hit a wall, perhaps a fist, followed by something that sounded like a sob. “It cannot be good to keep him sedated for so long. I’m leaving immediately. And Cody, where exactly are you?”

There had been emotion hidden in his altered voice, and Cody could tell he was panicking. As much as Vader proclaimed to hate his former Master, Cody knew that he didn’t want him dead. Cody reminded himself that this was good. They wanted a rash and anxious Vader who didn’t spend much time thinking this plan through.

“I’m on a primitive Outer Rim planet called Saijo. There’s one settlement, and they’re keeping him in a warehouse there. They seem like they don’t know what to do with him. They haven’t made any moves to get rid of him yet.”

“Can you take them on yourself, Cody? And where is Dee5?”

That stupid droid. “There are too many of them. If I fail, they’ll take him and run. And they caught on to the droid and destroyed it.”

“Curious.” Vader seemed to have calmed down, voice back to its new-found cadence. “An assassin droid is hard to get rid of. They may be more formidable than they seem.”

Isn’t that the truth, thought Cody. “Perhaps. I’ll need help or a large amount of credits if you want me to claim him.”

“Credits will not be possible. The Emperor would be made aware of a large transaction, even in my name. We’ll have to take him by force. The Emperor has not yet informed me of my next duties so I am free, for now. I will join you, and we’ll take him ourselves. We cannot risk anyone else knowing about this.”

“Very wise, my Lord.”

“Send me the coordinates. As soon as I can procure the appropriate ship, I’ll depart.”

Cody transmitted the coordinates and fell back in his chair, shaking, stars blurring in front of his eyes. Waves of alternating relief and guilt flowed through him, almost choking him. He felt a large, warm hand on his shoulder, steadying.

“That’s it, old man, you did it. Let’s get you back to your quarters.” Rex helped him up and they wandered back. It was done, for now.

* * *

It was time for late meal, and Ahsoka had been told, in no uncertain terms, that she was to fetch Obi-Wan, and not allow him to ‘wallow’ as the doctor put it. As she approached his quarters, she could hear voices within.

One voice was clearly his, but the other was one she’d never heard, and the low, melodious voice didn’t belong to anyone she knew. Reaching out with her mind, she realized that she couldn’t sense another being in the room, though the Force felt strange and alive, like the quiet before a storm. The door opened, and Obi-Wan waved her in.

“Hello Ahsoka. It’s time that you meet someone,” he said, sitting back on the bed.

There was someone else in the room, but she didn’t know what he was. He was a bluish white, very tall human man who happened to be translucent, almost like a hologram, yet not. The Force cracked and snapped around him, like a loose wire. Despite this, he had a friendly smile.

Ahsoka backed against the closed door, unsure what this meant.

“Hello Ahsoka, my grand, grand Padawan, I’ve wanted to meet you.”

So this was Qui-Gon Jinn? Obi-Wan’s Master? How could it be? “But you’re…”

“Dead? Yes, I am. Before I died, I found a way to preserve consciousness after death. I’ll tell you about it sometime.”

That made things clear as mud. “Um, I didn’t know that was a thing?”

He had a gentle, musical laugh. “It hasn’t been done in a very long time... I must thank you for rescuing my wayward Padawan.”

“Rescuing?” Obi-Wan asked, affronted.

“Yes, rescuing, little brat. That planet was killing you. You’d have grown old and died long before your time if you would have stayed there.”

Brat? Ahsoka tried to contain her giggles. “You did look pretty bad, Master.”

Obi-Wan looked contrite. “Did either of you think that maybe it was for the best? I failed with Anakin before. Who’s to say I won’t again?”

Qui-Gon gave him a soft, fond look. “We’ll be here to help you. You are never alone and you are dear to us. If we fail, we do so together.”

Obi-Wan buried his face in his hands, scrubbing at his short beard. “I’m not who I was before.”

“Neither are we. But what other choice do we have?” Ahsoka said firmly. There was no time to back out now.

“None.” He released his face, sitting back upright and Ahsoka felt relieved. “As this grows closer, I have more doubts. I suppose its natural,” Obi-Wan said.

The ghost chuckled again. “Good boy for admitting that. Now, Ahsoka, I would guess you came here for a reason.”

“To bring this one to dinner.” She said, pointing at her Grand Master. “The doctor said he couldn’t stay cooped up in here. We have to eat up before the big event.”

Qui-Gon grinned broadly while Obi-Wan just shook his head, exasperated.

“I like how you think, little one. We’ll talk again.” With that Qui-Gon disappeared, fading into the ether. It was one of the weirder things that had happened to her, but anything seemed to be possible about now. Ahsoka shrugged and took Obi-Wan by the arm. “Well you heard him Master, let’s go.”

* * *

Darth Vader flew low over a tree-filled canopy, near approaching the coordinates Cody had sent. He wondered if there had been an error, as there was no visible settlement. He’d have to pull up a map if there was one. This ship was old and acquired from a shady dealer on Nal Hutta and poorly equipped with no time for retrofitting.

He’d forgone wearing his helmet and had covered the respirator with a cape to appear less conspicuous. With his shaved head and scars, he doubted he’d be recognized as the man he once was.

Loud as thunder, he heard a sharp crack and the ship started to rock, descending rapidly and skimming the tree tops. Smoke filled the cockpit. A shot, of course. He’d been discovered or betrayed.

There was nothing to do but crash, and he was damn good at it. After some rapid-fire maneuvering, he ended up wedged between two of the largest trees he’d ever seen. Using the Force, he made it down to the needle-carpeted forest floor.

The long-range communicator on the ship was shit to begin with and who knows if it survived the crash. It would probably faster just to find the settlement. He laughed at the absurdity and riled at the indignity of it, the Emperor’s pet lost in the woods. Vader would face his wrath for this one, and perhaps Cody would face his as well.

Vader sat against a rock for a moment catching his breath while reaching out with the Force, sending tendrils of it through the woods, searching. He thought he caught a whiff of something familiar, something both hated and dear, but it passed with the gentle wind that shook the canopy.

His thoughts were interrupted by a very familiar chirp and burble. R2 was flying in to this little clearing. Perplexed, Vader rubbed at his eyes. Was this a fever dream or vision, or had he hit his head? He reached out and patted the droid’s domed head and he let out a low whine in greeting. It was solid and real.

Something in him melted, just a little. At least no one was here to see his weakness. He knelt down and put his arms around his dear friend that he’d missed so much. R2 bounced, just a little. “Hey buddy, it’s me.”

Leaning against the cool metal, he wondered what it would be like to just stay here out in the woods and never be found again, be swallowed by the earth, but no. The Emperor needed him. He would find a way out. With that thought, something sharp pierced his arm, and he felt consciousness leave him as the forest around faded to darkness. _So this is how it will be_ , he thought to himself as the world went still.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're so close to the obikin! Trust me friends, I'm ready for it too XD
> 
> Thank you for reading and thank you to everyone who's left kudos, comments, and bookmarked this! 
> 
> If you'd like, let me know what you think!
> 
> Big thanks to my lovely beta picavenger14 for her patience and hard work!!
> 
> @darthplodder on Tumblr


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, I'm back at this one again! 
> 
> Reunion time! I hope you enjoy it!

Obi-Wan had been in agony since Anakin arrived, but he supposed he deserved it. Wild emotions echoed through him, anger, hate, betrayal, despair. Anakin’s unconscious mind was restless, screaming out to anything that would hear it, feeding on any energy it found. Obi-Wan felt physically ill.

Obi-Wan wandered around the compound as the sun rose in the sky. How different it was from Tatooine, everything damp and growing, heedless of the trials of those nearby. Obi-Wan was trying to ignore his growing malaise, hoping the cool, fresh air would revive him. A seated meditation had failed, so he tried a moving one, hoping to clear his mind and alleviate the dizzy, sick fatigue that plagued him.

He’d forced himself to watch as they carried an unconscious Anakin into the locked cell in the infirmary. He hadn’t been wearing the top of his helmet, and he’d caught the briefest glimpse of his face, features still impossibly beautiful in repose.

Obi-Wan had assumed their bond was broken, burned to ash on Mustafar, but to both his horror and relief it wasn’t. Some part of it had survived, a tiny seedling growing through the cracks in a rock. Every time Anakin would approach consciousness, it left him shuddering and wrecked, his whole body trembling.

The force of Anakin’s emotions cut through him like knives, and his legs could no longer support his body. This was his fault. His fault. The mossy ground he landed on was soft and cool, a good place to rest for a while. Darkness welcomed him like an old friend.

* * *

Vader lay uncommonly still and quiet on his cot in the containment cell. Gathered in the infirmary outside, a small crowd watched him on the video screen. Ahsoka, Rex, and Nima, the healer, were there. Cody and Obi-Wan were nowhere to be found.

“That’s enough, he’s not a tamed rancor on display at a curio show. Shoo,” Nima said, crossing her arms. “He won’t wake up for a while longer.”

Ahsoka pulled Rex with her and sat down on one of the cots, away from the screen. “Do you think you can help him? To heal some?”

“I’m not sure he deserves it,” Rex said, grumbling.

“Stop it Rex! We talked about this. He was my Master.”

“I know who he was.” Rex scrubbed his hand across his short-cropped hair. “Doesn’t mean I can forgive him,” he said, looking away.

Ahsoka looked up, and Nima was standing before them. “We’re not here to have a philosophical discussion on who deserves medical attention. Yes, I think I can help him substantially. I can likely get him off the respirator collar and feeding tube and maybe help some of the scarring.”

Rex didn’t look entirely swayed, but had nothing else to say, out loud at least.

“You’re going to go in first, aren’t you?” He asked Nima.

“I’ve been ‘in there’ with him already. I assume you mean once he’s awake? I think it’s for the best. He doesn’t know me, and I can help him, or at least make him feel better.”

Ahsoka nodded. She felt nervous, twitchy. Now that he was here, she was terrified. It hadn’t seemed real, not until now. Seeing his solid, black bulk, all the words she thought to say were gone. Part of her was relieved she’d have a little time before facing her doom, part of her wanted it over with.

“He’s still sedated, anyway. It will be a while until he wakes,” Nima said, looking around the room, her face growing concerned. “Have you seen your Grandmaster or Cody?”

“Not since we got back to the base,” Ahsoka said, looking at Rex.

“Don’t look at me, I’ve been with you the whole time. I’ve no idea where the General is. Cody’s in his bunk. I told him to rest.”

“Good man,” Nima said. “Before our prisoner wakes, we had best find Kenobi. I get the feeling something isn’t right.”

Ahsoka felt it too. He was excellent at shielding, but the Force felt too empty, too off. They all went off to look for him, but he was hard to find. He wasn’t in his quarters, the commissary, or the hangers, nor in the communications room or the armory. Something told her to go outside, and she listened.

She found him in a sorry, still, heap behind the complex, skin dew damp and cold. His pulse raced in his throat, but he didn’t wake when she shook him. Ahsoka felt a wave of frustration and despair run through her. This couldn’t be happening. Not now. Didn’t he realize they needed him, that this whole kriffing plan was hinging on him? In a wave of anger, she kicked at the dirt and rocked back on her heels.

Ahsoka roped Rex into carrying him back to the infirmary, where he lay Obi-Wan on one of the cots. Nima rushed over to him with one of the droids in tow. They connected him to monitors while the others stood helpless. Ahsoka wanted to scream, to crush something with her bare hands until it shattered into a million pieces.

“What’s wrong with him?” Ahsoka asked, voice tight and shaking.

“Is he drunk? I mean he doesn’t smell like it but…” Rex asked softly.

Nima looked up from her patient, brows furrowed. “No, he’s not. He’s simply collapsed, his body and mind too exhausted to go on. I had a feeling this would happen.”

“Why?” Ahsoka nearly yelled, exasperated. Didn’t he realize this was the time to be strong? She needed the old Obi-Wan back.

“He’s not well, Ahsoka. He barely had any time to recover before we pushed him into this.” She put her violet hand on Obi-Wan’s forehead. “Having his old lover back in this state isn’t helping.” Whatever she sensed made her frown. “I’m sure that they’re still bonded. It’s too much psychic backlash.”

“He’s strong. He’s always been strong. I need him to be himself, not this!”

“We’ve all been changed by what happened, Ahsoka. You can’t just go back to how things used to be.”

They were interrupted by loud wailing coming from the doorway. The Alderaanian girl was carrying a red and snotty face Luke, who was clinging to her dress with one chubby fist and crying his heart out. His unshielded despair rocked Ahsoka and left her bereft.

“I’m sorry Master Healer, but I can’t get him to calm. He’s been fussy for the last day, but now won’t stop crying. I’ve tried everything I can think of,” the girl said, nearly distraught herself.

Nima left Obi-Wan’s side and took Luke into her arms. He settled for a moment against her and then promptly started to yell again, while burying his face against her coat. She whispered to him softly and caressed his face with her free hand. He whimpered a few times then fell asleep, resting against her as she sat down in a chair.

“What did you do?” the girl asked.

“Sleep suggestion is all. He’s over stimulated by all this commotion and needs to rest. Why don’t you go get some sleep yourself?” Nima asked.

The girl nodded and scurried out of the room. Ahsoka looked down at Luke and Obi-Wan, utterly overwhelmed. How was this going to work? What had she done? Should she have taken them? Was she worse than the Emperor himself?

Ahsoka suspected she’d made a giant mistake and felt the beginnings of hot tears behind her eyes. Nearly trembling, she sunk down on one of the beds, burying her face in her hands. Was she a monster? She could feel Nima and Rex’s eyes on the back of her head, worrying, questioning.

“Excuse me for a minute,” she said, almost gasping out the words, and ran out the door into the hall, heading for her quarters at a quick jog. Thankfully, she was alone. She collapsed onto the bed and sobbed, not caring that she was being emotional. She wasn’t a Jedi anymore. She was allowed to feel this.

Had she made a terrible mistake? Her plan had been ruthless, kidnapping a child and a man, who at the time, was unusually defenseless, and now it seemed to be falling apart. Was this the Force reminding her of her failures? But then, the Empire was so terrible for billions, so destructive and evil, wasn’t some sacrifice worth it?

She fell back on her bed, suddenly exhausted, her eyes closing. She was startled back to sitting when she heard a voice calling her name. She leapt to standing, reaching for her sabers. It wasn’t a voice she knew, or did she?

It was strange, no one was in the room with her, then suddenly, someone was though he was transparent and glowing.

“Hello Ahsoka. I hope I’m not intruding?”

“No, Master Qui-Gon.”

“I couldn’t help but feel your distress.”

“Master Obi-Wan collapsed when I need him most and Luke is upset. I… I wonder if I shouldn’t have done this. I wonder if I was wrong?”

“Right or wrong, what’s done is done, child. You have to pick up the pieces of this and carry on. You can’t undo the past.”

“Right now I wish I could.” On so many levels, at so many times, she could have done something different and maybe all of this would never have happened.

“Ahsoka, the galaxy must be saved. Balance must be restored. That was your goal, and it is a good one. You were decisive in your plan and it was done for the greater good.”

“It doesn’t feel very good right now.”

“No. It is a good lesson though. There are always consequences for our actions, even if they are well-intentioned. It comes of focusing only on the end result and not the means to get there. Meditate on that, if you can.”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“Don’t worry about Obi-Wan, he’ll wake up soon. And Luke isn’t an ordinary child. He’ll recover and adapt. Do be careful with them though, they’re more fragile than they seem.”

“You’re right. I think I might have asked too much of both of them.”

The ghost threw back his head and laughed. “Something like that. Ahsoka, it was a good plan, but no plan is perfect. Allow it to be fluid and bend with it. It will work out if the Force wills it.”

“Thank you, Master.”

“Now stop wallowing. Your friends need you,” he said with a smirk, then disappeared into the ether.

* * *

Nima left Obi-Wan’s bedside after giving him some fluids and nutrients intravenously. This was too much for his still recovering body. He would wake up soon, but they had to watch how hard they pushed him. Luke himself had woken up a little cranky but had calmed and now was playing with his ball, watching everything with his own brand of calm attention.

She could sense that her other patient was awake and restless in his cell. They couldn’t keep sedating him, and it was time to face their demon. He was Force suppressed and groggy from sedation, tethered with restraints, but still truly formidable. The others, except Obi-Wan, would stand guard.

Nima stood outside the door and let herself in as the others watched on the screen outside the room. Suppressed or not, his rage and despair were nearly suffocating. The Dark was cold around him, swirling chaotically, but it hadn’t yet fully taken control. They may just have time.

He sat on the bed, like a thing perched. Burning eyes, yellow with rimmed with sickly red, fixated on her as a predator would its prey. She did not fear death and she did not fear him. She would give him nothing to feed off.

Underneath it all, she suspected he was a frightened boy. How old was he really, 22, 23? A boy. A formidable boy, but young none the same.

“What do you want from me?” he growled, face unnaturally pale, horrifying eyes dark rimmed.

“I want to help you,” she said calmly.

He laughed, a horrifying sound. “I find that hard to believe. Where is Cody? Who is your master, Jedi?,” he hissed in his altered voice.

She studied him for a moment. His features were still fine, untouched by the burns. She could seem some scarring on the back of his neck, above the respirator. He still had his hair, though it was cut short against his head. There was something still beautiful about him, a fallen creature, lovely in its darkness.

“I have no Master. I am simply a healer.” She walked closer. “You’re smart enough to figure out why we have you.”

He continued to study her, his expression calculating. “You haven’t killed me, so you want me for something. Where is Cody? You didn’t answer me.”

“Cody is here. So is your droid.”

“I see. They were involved in this treachery and will be punished. Let me go and I’ll spare you when the Emperor finds me,” he leaned against the wall, feigning boredom.

“I’ve no desire to be spared. Anyway, I can help you.” She calmly approached him, touching the respirator.

He didn’t flinch or attack. Perhaps part of him was curious. “How would you do that, little Jedi?”

“I’ll say it bluntly. Your Master did not have you healed properly. I took the liberty of scanning you and running some tests while you were unconscious. With bacta treatments I could free you of the respirator. I also see no reason for you to need a feeding tube other than you’ve grown dependent on it.”

“Why should I believe you?”

She raised a brow ridge. “Do I seem false to you? I’ve no alliances, not anymore. Let me try. You have little to lose.”

He crossed his arms about his chest, menacing. “The Emperor will find me soon enough. All I have to do is wait, and you will be destroyed.”

“Then let me help you while you wait,” she said, continuing to keep her voice even and kind.

She saw a hint of uncertainty flash across his face and he paused before replying. “I demand to talk with the leader of this operation.”

Nima wasn’t sure how that would go, but she would oblige. “As you wish,” she said, leaving the room.

She found Ahsoka outside the cell. “You heard him, my dear. It’s your turn.”

* * *

Ahsoka steeled herself, squaring her shoulders and holding herself tall. She would face this. She would face this and win. She’d broken their bond when she’d left the order, but she still felt overwhelmed by his presence. She missed him so much. She couldn’t reconcile his dark deeds with the kind Master she’d loved and wasn’t sure how she ever would. Swallowing back bile, Ahsoka tried to not feel physically ill.

Any calm she was channeling left her when she saw his eyes. He stared at her in anger like a caged gundark. Deep under it all, she could still sense of hint of the one she’d known, her Skyguy.

“Ahsoka,” he said softly, eyes wide, obviously surprised at who walked through the door.

She approached him cautiously, her voice hesitant. “Master… Master, I’m here with you.”

Ahsoka wanted nothing more than for him to grin, for his eyes to turn back to blue, and for the whole thing to be forgotten, like some dark dream.

“I’m not your Master, Ahsoka, not anymore. Unless you want to join me. The Emperor might just welcome you.”

She stood her ground. “Never.”

“Than what do you want? I grow tired of all this talk. The Emperor will be here soon.”

Ahsoka sat in the chair by the bed. “I doubt it. Master, do you really want to stay with him? He’s terrible. Join me, Master. Stay with me.”

“Why?”

“To be free of the Emperor. To be free, Master. You can stay Dark for all I care, but just help us end him.”

“Never! The Emperor saved me. He is bringing order to the galaxy.”

Ahsoka felt her own anger rise within her. “Do you really believe that? Are you anything to him other than an attack dog? A brute? A slave, Master?”

Maybe that was the wrong thing to say. She could feel him growing enraged. “Do not speak to me of that! Go Ahsoka! Go! I’ll never help you.” He turned to look away from her. “Now leave me alone,” he growled, eyes blazing.

Ahsoka didn’t budge. “I’m not leaving you again, Master.”

“Get out…. GET OUT!” he shouted.

Ahsoka obeyed, but she could feel doubt mixed in with his wavering conviction. Maybe they could wear him down. She tried to not run out of the room, and once free, stood outside gasping, her whole body shaking. She’d faced him, and though it was terrifying, she felt better for it.

* * *

Obi-Wan woke some time later, unsure of how much time had passed. His mouth felt dry, voice hoarse and unused. He gingerly sat up, and Nima was soon beside him.

“How do you feel?” She asked.

“Like a partially revived corpse.”

She laughed, then made him drink some water and a nutrient drink. He could still feel Anakin, but it seemed more tolerable. His head wasn’t pounding anymore.

“You were at the end of your endurance, I’m afraid. Having him here hasn’t helped.”

“What little endurance I have left,” he said, shrugging.

“You’ll get stronger if you put your mind to it. You know that.”

He did, but it felt insurmountable. He wasn’t sure he was the same person as the Jedi Master he’d been before. He sighed and tried to tidy his hair with one hand. “I suppose I do.”

Nima smiled at him. “Rest now. Don’t even think about seeing him until tomorrow. I’ll tie you down if I have to.”

He raised a brow to that and grinned, laying back against the bed. Tomorrow would come soon enough.

He spent the day in rest and had recovered some from his set back, though he still felt a bit weak and wobbly like a newborn bantha. He’d grown used to the sensation of Anakin’s dark emotions bleeding through his shields, like the ache of a long healing wound. It was time now, time to face him.

The others were standing around him, looking on expectantly. Nima put her hand on his shoulder in solidarity.

“You don’t have to do this if you don’t feel ready. I’d rather you spent some time getting stronger first.”

“I’m not sure I’ll ever be ready. I had a hand in creating this monster, and I’m not sure I deserve mercy or rest.”

“All the same, I don’t think you don’t deserve more suffering.”

Obi-Wan smiled gently at her. “Perhaps not. Unrestrain him while I’m in there.”

“He’ll hurt you, Master,” Ahsoka said, crossing her arms.

Obi-Wan rubbed at his beard, exhausted. He wanted nothing more than to sleep. He wasn’t sure how long he’d remain upright. “Probably, but he won’t kill me. I know it.”

“I’m pulling you out of there if I don’t like what I see,” Nima said, frowning.

“Let me do this. I know him,” Obi-Wan said, resigned. He got up and entered the cell.

Anakin was sitting on the floor in the corner of the room. He made a low hissing sound, an unhinged grin spreading across his face.

“My old Master. I guessed you’d be here.” He laughed, a horrible broken sound.

Vader stood up and walked towards him, looming large, taller than he used to be. “How far you’ve fallen.”

He grabbed the front of Obi-Wan’s shirt with a black, gloved hand. Obi-Wan stood still, trying not to flinch or betray any nerves. “Look at you, a broken old man. You’re a shadow of your former self. I could strangle your scrawny neck with one hand.”

Obi-Wan felt himself be lifted off the ground, held so they were face to face. He didn’t fight it and kept his features even. “I’ve fallen, Darth? Me?”

Obi-Wan laughed, trying not to give in to the hysteria bleeding through him. “Go ahead. Do it. You want to feel my bones crack in your hand, don’t you?”

Vader shoved him against the wall so hard his teeth rattled, sharp pain echoing through his abused body. Vader then let go, and Obi-Wan fell to the ground, unable to catch himself, stars shining in his eyes.

Vader knelt down and loomed over him, pressing his shoulders into the floor.

“What do you want Darth? To kill me? If you do, go ahead.”

There was no answer but the heavy breathing of the respirator and the darkness seeping around them.

“You don’t know what you want, do you, Anakin?” Obi-Wan asked softly.

“Don’t call me that,” Vader hissed.

“You wanted to find me. You were looking. I know it. All that work just to kill me? I doubt it.”

“I hate you. You did this to me.”

“You did it to yourself, Anakin. But, I, I can help you.”

“What are you talking about, you old fool?”

Obi-Wan pushed himself up as best he could to whisper against his ear. “Help us Anakin, and I’ll be yours. I’ll be whatever you want me to be. Your slave, your master, whatever you please.”

Vader released some of the pressure on his shoulders. “Help you do what?”

“Kill the Emperor.”

Another long pause, punctuated by the grate of the respirator. “Get out,” Vader said softly, without conviction. “Get out.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> If you'd like, let me know what you think!
> 
> The biggest thanks to my friend and beta reader picavenger14 for all her help!


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